TRANSCRIPT: S1E11 Sub Sonic
[as transcribed by MoKat {mokat01@lycos.com}]

(Opening scene: one of Robotnik's oil drilling platforms)
ROBOTNIK: Excellent, Snively.  
*Robotnik's face appears on a monitor* 
ROBOTNIK: It appears that the probes have found another oil lake.
SNIVELY: It appears that way, Sir.
ROBOTNIK: What are the holding tank oil levels?
SNIVELY: 36 percent capacity, Sir.  By tonight we should reach 50 percent.
ROBOTNIK: Oh, I assure you Snively, you will do better than 50 percent; much better.
SNIVELY: But, Sir, we've been running at maximum power for 10 days...
ROBOTNIK: We will go on 10 days if necessary.  Understood?
SNIVELY: Understood, Sir.
ROBOTNIK: There is a world of oil down there, Snively, and I shall have it all.

(scene change: Great Forest)
SALLY: I just don't understand it, Rotor.  I calculated the exact proportions of water to sun ratio and energized the soil, but these trees don't respond.
ROTOR: Yeah.  They look pretty sick all right.  In fact, a lot of the trees around here aren't looking so hot.
SALLY: Antoine, how are the other trees doing?
ANTOINE: *sigh* Oh, not so too very good my Princess.
TAILS: How come the trees are dying, Aunt Sally?
SALLY: Well, I think Robotnik's pollution is spreading farther and farther from the city, honey.
ANTOINE: Well, I am thinking that maybe they die from this horrible fraternizer.  Phew!
TAILS: *laughs* Not fraternizer, Antoine.  Fertilizer.
(*SFX: thunder*)
ANTOINE: What is this?
SALLY: Looks like a storm is coming.  Maybe some rain will bring these trees back to life.

(scene change: Sonic on a bridge)
SONIC (singing): Just put the pedal to the metal and baby I guarantee...
SONIC (singing): You'll be juicin' to the tenth degree.  Crank it supersonic.  It don't take any fuel, cuz the rocket's in my pocket and I'm wa-a-a-a-a-a-ay past cool!
SONIC: (bowing to an imaginary audience) Thank you, thank you. Thank you, thank you.
SONIC: Whoa!  Hang on, fish sticks, cuz we're gonna rock 'n' reel!
(*Sonic is dragged down river*)
SONIC: Whoa!  This is one tough tuna!
SONIC: *cough* Rather have a chili dog anyway.

(scene change: back to the dying trees)
SONIC: And I'll tell ya, that fish stick was so big, he pulled me right off the bridge and I water-skied behind him for 10 miles.  Then he stole my pole!
ROTOR: Bummer.  I was ready for some fish sticks.
TAILS: I bet he was big as a tree, huh Sonic?  Bet it was even big as a house, huh?
SONIC: You got it, big guy.
ANTOINE: Pardoning moi, Sonic, but are you thinking we were born tomorrow, hmm?
SONIC: It's all true, Ant.  A hedgehog never lies.
SONIC: Whoa!  What's up with the old flower?
ANTOINE: Ah!  Fanstastique!
SALLY: Oh my gosh!  Sonic, what did you do?
SONIC: I dunno.  I just knocked water out of my ear.  Like this.
SONIC: Guess it wasn't the water.
TAILS: Wow!  Cool, Sonic!
ANTOINE: I do not believing my ears...
SALLY: Sonic, where did this water come from?
SONIC: The Great River, near our bridge.
SALLY: Then we have to get more of it.

(scene change: in a boat, on the river)
SONIC: Very cool boat.
ROTOR: Gosh, no big deal.
SONIC: Come on, man; you're totally hot with the ol' hammer.
ROTOR: Yeah, but who cares about some nerdy handyman.  I'd rather be a superhero like you.  Now that's cool.
SONIC: Can't argue that.  When you're right, you're right.  But it's still a cool boat.
ANTOINE: Rotor!  Look out for the big log!
SONIC: Just chill and enjoy the scenery, Ant.
ANTOINE: Oui.  Oui.  *takes a deep breath*  I am chilling.
SALLY: Look guys.  Those trees are dying, just like the ones in Knothole.  Somehow, we have to figure out a way to revive them before the whole forest dies.
SONIC: Maybe that weird, green water will do it.
ANTOINE: Rotor, why are we going too fast?
ROTOR: Yeah, current is picking up speed.
SALLY: Can't you slow us down, Rotor?
ROTOR: I can try.
SONIC: Man, we're really startin' to juice!  Hey!  What's up?
ANTOINE: I am not liking this too much, Rotor!
*alll scream as the boat enters a whirlpool*
SALLY: My gosh!  Where are we?
ROTOR: That's what I'd like to know.
SONIC: Looks like some kind of underground lake.
SONIC: Definitely a dump!
SALLY: Bet that means Robotnik can't be far.
SONIC: Get a grip, Ant.
ANTOINE: Oui.  Oui.  A grip...
SONIC: *grunts*  Crank up the motor, Rotor.
ROTOR: Check.
SALLY: Nicole, check the map file for "subterranean".
NICOLE: Checking...No subterranean file exists.
SALLY: Looks like we're on our own, guys.
ROTOR: In more ways than one.  We lost the motor.
ANTOINE: Lost the m-m-motor?  Then how are we getting out of this terrible place?
SALLY: Turn up ahead, Antoine.
ANTOINE: Palace guards are not meant for the rowing of the boot, my Princess.  
[Yes, he said "boot" instead of "boat" there.  What was the writer smoking?]
SONIC: Eww!  Check this junkberg!
SONIC: Yo, Ant!  Angle to the right!  Ant!  
SONIC: (sarcastic) Nice move, Ant.  
SONIC: Ant?
SALLY: Antoine?  Antoine!?  
SALLY: Antoine!!
ROTOR: I just don't get it.  One minute he's here, and then he's gone.
SALLY: *sigh*
SONIC: We'll find him, Rote.
SALLY: I sure hope so.
SONIC: Man, this is some major mong.
["mong" => a mixture.  Yeah, I actually had to look up that one o.O;]
ROTOR: Oh, now what?
ALL: Waterfall!
SONIC: Hang on!  I'll give it a little juice.
SALLY: Come on, Sonic, you can do it!
ROTOR: That's it, Sonic!
SALLY: Push, Sonic!
ROTOR: That was close.  Great job, Sonic.
SALLY:  Sonic, you are a very, very brave hedgehog. *kisses Sonic*  Thank you.
SONIC: Any time, Sal.
ROTOR: Guys, check out the water.
SALLY: Wha?  It's boiling!  There's nowhere to go!
SONIC: Yeah there is!  Grab on, guys!

(scene change: plant filled cavern.  Sonic, Sally, & Rotor are walking.)
SALLY: Antoine!
SONIC: Ant!  Where are you, man?
ROTOR: Hey, guys.  You get the feeling we're being watched?
SONIC: By whom?  The plants?
ROTOR: I dunno.  I just feel something watchin' us.
SALLY: *laughs* You're just paranoid, Rotor.  Oh!  Look at this beautiful flower.
SONIC: Man!  What is that flower?  A snapdragon?
SALLY: Sonic!  Behind you!
SONIC: All right; that's it!  Now you're making me mad!
SONIC: That's what you get for being rude!
ROTOR: Sonic!  Sally's gone!
SONIC: Gone?!
ROTOR: She was right here next to me, and then she disappeared!
SONIC: Sally!  Sally!

(Scene shift: deeper into the cavern)
ROTOR: Sally!  Sally!
SONIC: Man, this looks like some kind of palace.
ROTOR: Yeah, but what's with this smell?  Just like Robotropolis.
SONIC: Doesn't anybody take out the trash around here?  Eww!
ROTOR: Wow.  Look at this.
SONIC: Wait here, Rote.  I'll scope it out.
SONIC: Ant?  Sally?  You guys in here?
ROTOR: Hmm...Sonic's fishing pole. *Sonic shouts*  Sonic?!
SONIC: Bail, Rote!  Warp ten!
*Rotor falls down a trash-covered hole*
SONIC: Rote!  Rote!  Lemmie go, man!  My main walrus needs help!
UNDERGROUND KING: Look what you have done to my world, surface creature!
SONIC: Pal, I know you're havin' a bad day, but I don't have a clue what you're talking about!
UNDERGROUND KING: I will show you what I am talking about.

(scene change: further underground)
*Rotor lands in green water*
ROTOR: What is this stuff?  Wait a sec...it's that same green water.  No wonder this place is so green.

(scene change: pollution pit)
ANTOINE: This is terrible.  Terrible!  I have my whole life behind me!  This is all your fault, Sonic the hog-hedge!
SONIC: Hedgehog, Ant.  Hedge.  Hog.
SALLY: Now, why is it Sonic's fault, Antoine?
ANTOINE: Because...he is the hero, but he cannot get us out of this terrible place!
SONIC: Yeah, because this pollution pit zapped all my juice!
SALLY: Rotor!
*a one-eyed gator surfaces and Antoine gasps*
SALLY: Sonic!  The level's rising!  Try again for the power ring!

(scene change: back to Rotor)
ROTOR: Oil.  *gasps*  Robotnik!
ROTOR: Whoa!  What is that?
SALLY: Help!  Someone help!
ANTOINE: Help me!
SALLY: *coughs*  Help!
ROTOR: Sonic!
SONIC: Hurry, Rote!  Get the power ring!
ANTOINE: Yes, yes!  Please to hurry!
ROTOR: I'm comin' guys!  Hang on!
SONIC: Fight it, Rote!  Fight it!
SALLY: Rotor!  Hold on!
SONIC: Way to go, Rote!
ANTOINE: Hurry!  The slime is rising!
ROTOR: Go, Sonic!
SALLY: Sonic!
ROTOR: Gotcha, Antoine!
SONIC: Thanks, Rote.  You're a hero, man.
SALLY: *kisses Rotor*  A big hero.
ANTOINE: Oui.  As one big hero to another, I salute you, Rotor.
ROTOR: Aw, it's no big deal...
ANTOINE: *screams*
ROTOR: We gotta jam!  It's the snake probes!
SALLY: Snake probes?
ROTOR: They're laser-powered diggers.  Robotnik is using them to drill for oil.
SALLY: (sarcastic) Aw, great.
SALLY: We should have known Robotnik was behind this!
ANTOINE: *screams*
SONIC: Let's juice!  *gasps*
SALLY: Sonic, what...Oh my gosh!
ANTOINE: *screams*
UNDERGROUND KING: There is no escape, surface dwellers.  You will die from this pollution, as all my people have.
SONIC: You keep talkin', big guy, and I'll just keep on wonderin' what you're saying.
UNDERGROUND KING: I was once king of a beautiful world, but everything was destroyed by you surface creatures.  And I *coughs* am the only one left.
SONIC: This is not our pollution.
SALLY: There's another surface creature.  His name is Robotnik.  He's polluted our world as well as yours.
(*snake probes attack*)
ANTOINE: I am making a tasty retreat!
SONIC: Hold it, Ant!  We've gotta help the big guy!
SONIC: Rote, where are these things comin' from?
ROTOR: The surface.  Robotnik's drilling platform.
SONIC: I'm goin' up!
(*Sonic reaches the surface*)
SONIC: Man, this is major!
ROBOTNIK: Isn't it lovely, Snively?
SNIVELY: A sight to behold, Sir.
ROBOTNIK: Snively, shoo that fly off the screen.
SNIVELY: I'm-I'm afraid that's not a fly, Sir.  It's the hedgehog.
ROBOTNIK: Gah!  Sound Code Red!
ROBOTNIK: Activate all snake probes!
SWATbot: Activating all snake probes, Sir.
SONIC: Quick question; can this chair go in reverse?  Whoa!  Yep.
SONIC: Snake probes...emergency destruct.  Yeah!  My kinda button.
ROBOTNIK: No, no, no; this can't be happening.  No, no, no, NO!
SONIC: Past cool, hedgehog.  Past cool.  Now, I wonder what will happen if I punch all these buttons.  Only one way to find out…
SONIC (singing): Just put the pedal to the metal and baby I guarantee...
SONIC (singing): You'll be juicin' to the tenth degree.  Crank it supersonic.  It don't take any fuel, cuz the rocket's in my pocket and I'm wa-a-a-a-a-a-ay past cool!
SONIC: Uh, oh.  I'm outta here.

(scene change: back underground)
ROTOR: Well, here goes...
SALLY: Oh.  It's beautiful.
SONIC: Yeah.  Too bad there's not enough for the Great Forest.
UNDERGROUND KING: Take this, Sonic.  Maybe it will help.
SONIC: Thanks, big guy.  And, uh, lemmie know if you ever wanna go fishing.

(scene change: back at the dying trees)
SALLY: Okay.  Keep your fingers crossed, guys.
TAILS: Alright!  Cool!  Sonic!
SALLY: Well, that's a start.
SONIC: Yep.  How's it feel to be a hero, Rote?
ROTOR: *groans*  Exhausting.  From now on, I'm happy to be a handyman.

[End of Transcript]