*Toilet paper

*Emergency Urinal Cake

*Sasquatch Repellent

*A means of which to stop Snoopy

*rolled up, it makes a dandy fly swatter

*Also rolled up, it makes a fine dildo

*And also, when its rolled up, it can be a spyglass

*Carve a replica of the comic out of cheese, to amuse your friends

*Beat your dog with it

*Devour it when your low on food (it tastes like cheese and corn)

*Tear it up into bits, make confetti

*Burn enough of them and an alien will die

*Use the comic to attack france

*Beat your friends and enemies to death with it

*horny? Cut a hole in the comic and go to town, if your a girl, you can roll it up, as seen above

*Frame it, and stare at it

*weep for how many trees that had to die in order to make it

*Also, when you roll it up, its an excellent pea shooter

*Assasinate the president with it

*Grind it up and sell it as kitty litter

*Use it to fend off rogue eggs and sandwhiches

*Use it to cure "Montezumas Revenge"

*Use it to declare war on a small country

*Torture midgets with it

*Create a monster with it, use this monster for bizzare sex experiments

*Frighten the elderly with it

*Drench it in your own urine, then eat it

*You can make about 40 paper airplanes with one issue, then you can attack other people with your squadron

*Use it at a writing class about how NOT to do a comic