C.P.: "I am Captain Purple, the new heralder of Bill Gatesacus sent to destroy you. And I've had it up to here with people asking me if I get tired of purple. So prepare to dig it, Pig!"
Can our hero defeat this Spawm? Will anyone care? And will lonely people stop eating processed meat in the hopes of improving their sex lives?

Find out in the next issue at this same purple site!