BEFORE YOU READ: 

The PFFL is a fighting tournament whose intent is to harmlessly
poke fun at the decidedly (and delightfully) weird world of
Pokemon fanfiction, particularly its SI and Mary Sue aspects...
though we are not limited to those. 

The 16 contenders for this tournament were chosen based purely on
popular vote.  New characters beyond those sixteen will not be
admitted until such time as we choose to hold another tournament,
and another vote to determine who *those* sixteen contenders will
be. The match outcomes are also determined by vote, and a ballot
for the upcoming card can usually be found posted at our
homepage, along with the tournament's brackets.  All readers 
are invited to cast their votes regarding the outcome of future
matches.  The show's writers, however, do not vote in said
ballot, and make no decisions regarding the outcome of matches
save in the cases of a tie vote.  

You may send comments and criticisms to the writers via e-mail: 

Alicia Ashby: lynxara@bad-candy.com 
Tim McLees: yoritomo@cjnetworks.com

Enjoy the show! 
_________________________________________________________________

     A golden sunset illuminated the cityscape along the
Geo-Front of Tokyo-3. The restored and futuristic sky scrapers
gleamed with the fading sun, and the streets where relatively
quiet.
     A bicycle bell sounded, and a bike pedaled steadily across
the camera's view. The view panned to catch up with the rider: a
pale skinned young girl in a blue and white school dress. Her
stoic red gaze, currently focused intently on her course, clearly
revealed her as Rei Ayanami, the First Child.

     As the blue haired girl pedaled swiftly across the bridge,
she blinked once and brought her bike to a stop. She got off and
stood motionless, regarding something standing on the walkway in
the middle of the bridge. This particular something resembled a
petite lavender hippopotamus, standing no higher than Rei's
waist. His attention was fixed on the arena below him, in a
mystified, slightly vacant stare.
     Rei approached the creature, stopping at arm's length from
it, and looked down. The purple beast turned to her and looked
up, meeting her gaze. They stood silent for several moments,
maintaining the same curious and unblinking look.
     "What are you?" Rei finally asked flatly.
     "Poke..." the creature replied.
     A moment passed, a single blink from both Rei and it
interrupting their staring.
     "... and what do you want here?"
     "... Slow."
     They fell silent once more, processing the import of their
mysterious exchange.
     "...I see." Rei nodded. Both the First Child and Slowpoke
turned together to face the arena below them...

TOKYO-3
SADAMOTO MEMORIAL AUDITORIUM.

     The booming timpani rhythms and soaring violins of "Decisive
Battle" filled the arena rather than the usual PFFL theme, "Edge
of Soul", in honor of the unusually reserved crowd. It consisted
mostly of civilians, but was spotted throughout with the
distinctive brown and red uniforms of NERV's technicians. The
arena floor, too, was considerably more conservative and ominous
in design than usual. Two dark rampways with red trim led down to
the obsidian battlefield, with both its perimeter and the
trainer's areas outlined in red lights laid into the floor. A
pale spotlight shining overhead added to the shadowy appearance
of the barely-illuminated Pokemon arena.

     "This week's Pokemon League event certainly has a more
conservative, a more traditional feel, folks, but that does NOT
mean that you should expect anything but the greatest PFFL event
EVER! We are *live* from Tokyo-3, and I am Tony Schiavone," the
commentating team's WCW representative exclaimed. 
     "Along with Good ol' JR!" Jim Ross added. "And after
Mind Games over a year ago, I'm not surprised NERV is boosting up
the security precautions."
     "*Fortunately* we don't have magic slinging black hedgehogs
to worry about this time, Jim," Joey Styles stated.
     "This time we just have magic slinging black Pikachus," JR
replied. 
     "Tonight's show features the second half of PFFL's inaugural 
opening round matches." Tony mentioned. "And will thus determine
the remaining quarter-finalists."

     The beats of the Sailor Moon Musical theme, "La Soldier,"
resounded throughout the arena as a young red-haired girl sitting
atop the back of a Ponyta rode out into the battlefield.
     "Our first match-up is a variant of the Circle of Masters 
rules," Joey announced. "As both trainers are adept riders, they
will fight in tandem with their mounted Pokemon."
     "A kind of jousting, then?" Tony asked. 
     "Well, the gal looks quite comfortable riding that fiery
steed," JR remarked, before La Soldier was replaced by the
jarring guitar chords of Iron Maiden's "The Mercenary." 
     "I'd never guess this hired gun would be into horseback
riding, though," Tony was abruptly cut off as the sneering
mercenary trotted onto the top of the railway... on a snarling
black steed, wisps of livid green smoke flowing off its mane and
tail.  It was not completely unlike Amanda's Ponyta, but much
larger and muscular. "...and what on earth is he riding?!"
     "An genetically engineered Pokemon from his homeworld,
Tony," Joey responded, regarding his notes. "A Poison/Psychic
hybrid by the name...  Nightmare. An alarmingly fitting name."
     "It's a wonder Amanda and Dario can handle those Pokemon 
stallions...." JR pondered.
     "Well, it's just further proof of the amazing diversity and
utility a trainer and Pokemon can achieve," Joey replied
brightly. "But now... the bell has rung, and this unusual match
is about to begin!" 

Dario Dariani vs Amanda
CIRCLE OF MASTER RULES

     "Our combatants take the field at opposite ends of the
ring," JR reported. "And I'm not sure how Amanda's going to fare
against a beast like Dario's Nightmare." The wiry assassin peered
at his prey over the top of his mount's head. Nightmare, too,
gave a contemptuous snort towards his opponent, noxious vapor
escaping its snout.
     Amanda inhaled sharply and readied the reins around her
Ponyta's snout. She tightened her grip around the straps... and
with a sharp kick, her steed started its charge into the
Circle's center.  Likewise, Dario shouted and reared his dark
horse Pokemon up onto its hind legs before dashing onward with
unearthly speed.

     "And the stallions are off on their first charge!" Tony 
exclaimed. "HUZZAH!"
     "Better lay off the mead there, Sir Schiavone," Joey
quipped. "Amanda and Dario are charging at breakneck speed, they
meet in the middle... and Dario's taking the melee approach to
start out!" 
     Nightmare was the first to attack, raising up and flailing
with its front hooves. Amanda snarled in frustration, but her
steed managed to swerve enough to avoid the glancing blow and
leapt up for a Front Kick of her own.

     "They're trading off wild blows here, going hoof to hoof,"
JR commented. "It's a wonder these trainers can stay on through
all this-- Nightmare's leapin' back, spins..."
     "And drives a solid Rear Kick into Ponyta's side!" Tony
finished. Amanda cried out as her steed staggered and nearly fell
over. The red-haired rider regained her concentration and snapped
her reins, causing Ponyta to leap into the air as her rider
ducked her head down. 

     "Ponyta's back on her feet- and she's letting the sparks
fly!" Joey exclaimed as Ponyta's fiery mane flared, releasing a 
volley of flaming Embers toward Dario. 
     "But Dario's black steed is nimbly dodging the assault," JR
added as Nightmare swerved and leapt out of the bursts' way. 
     "Amanda's showing off some dazzling horsemanship prowess, as
she directs Ponyta into another spin..." Tony gasped with
anticipation. The flames from Ponyta's mane and tail shrank
briefly... before they increased in size and density. The mass of
suddenly-released flames spiraled toward Dario and Nightmare.

     "Oh my *God!*" Joey exclaimed. "Amanda's unleashed an
incredible Fire Spin!  There's no way Dario's mount can possible
dodge that--"
     Dario and his steed glared evenly at the incoming column of 
flame... and dispersed out of existence in an sulfurous explosion
of neon green smoke. The Fire Spin swept harmlessly through where
they had been standing moments before.
     "... but he did it anyway," Joey fumed.

     "Looks like Nightmare has access to a Teleport," JR noted,
as Dario and Nightmare phased back directly next to Amanda and
her steed. 
     "Dario's blipped back *right* next to her and-- Oh come on!
That ain't right," Joey protested as Dario gave a swift backhand
to the side of Amanda's head.
     "He's not through yet," Tony warned. "Nightmare leaps *way*
back, kicking into a spin, looks like he's doing a Fire Spin of
his own..."
     "No, he's not, Tony!" JR interrupted, wrinkling his nose.
Nebulous wisps of cloud-like energy trailed off of Dario's black
horse and began forming into a tempest of noxious fumes and gas
that barreled toward the stunned Amanda. 
     "That's the Vapor Storm, one of Nightmare's trademarks..."
Joey informed, pulling his shirt up over his mouth and nose. "And
it looks like that poor girl's stuck in the middle of it."
Moments later, as the Toxic Storm subsided, Amanda and Ponyta
staggered weakly from the cloud's midst.

     "Amanda and Ponyta are in bad shape, this could be it..."
Tony announced ominously. Nightmare stared intently at his
opponents, as a bright green horn of energy grew from it's for
head. "Nightmare's readying a Psychic attack to finish off
Ponyta..."
     "Tony, I don't think he's aiming for the horse..." JR
interrupted in disgust. Just then, Ponyta's redheaded rider began
wailing in pain, clutching the sides of her head and sobbing.
     "Under Circle of Master's rules, the trainer's a more than
viable target," Joey reminded them, somewhat grimly. "And a
trainer can take a lot less damage than her Pokemon
counterpart..."

     "Amanda's barely hanging onto her reigns, folks, and..."
Tony began as Dario reached into the holster at his side with a
cold smile. "No, he's not..."
     "That sadistic sonova--" JR yelled.
     Just then Ponyta sensed the threat to her master, and turned
her body just as Dario fired his Beretta. The shot pierced her
hind thigh, a minor but still painful wound. She toppled to the
ground along with her rider as the crowd thunderously voiced its
disapproval of Dario's action. Amanda, snapped out of the Psychic
attack's pain by her panic, rushed to Ponyta's side to check her
wound.

     "Ponyta's just took one for her master," Joey remarked with
a sniffle.
     "Fortunately it just grazed her, but still... Amanda may not
be able to finish the match! There's no way she could possibly
continue fighting after such an attack, and she's only registered
with *one Pokemon*...." Tony added, somewhat tastelessly
injecting a dose of artificial tension into the deadly scenario.
     "On the contrary, Tony, Amanda's getting up... and that girl
is rightfully *furious*!" JR interrupted.
     "But what can she do without a Pokemon?" Joey asked.

     Amanda stood up, glaring at Dario and his ebony steed
evenly. Then, with a dramatic flourish, she summoned a shimmering
golden stone into existence in her hand.  
     "... what on Earth did that girl just do?" JR wondered in
amazement. 
     "Well, it looks like she summoned a Thunder Stone to her
hand!  It's an item used to evolve some Electric-type Pokemon.
But I don't see how she's...." Joey trailed off as he watched her
raise it high into the air.
     "THUNDER STONE EVOLUTION... MAKE-UP!"
     Thunder boomed in the skies above Tokyo-3, and lightning 
inexplicably cascaded down to strike the young girl. In a
dazzling golden glow of electricity, her body transformed.  Her
silhouetted, nude frame became taller, more athletic, more
powerful... as it grew large yellow ears and a Pikachu-like
lightning-bolt tail.

     The announcers blinked silently as Amanda concluded her
henshin sequence. Smaller streams of electrical energy crossed
across Amanda's new, poke-anthropomorphized body, forming into
the familiar design of a gold-trimmed Sailor Senshi fuku. The
sides of her face crackled slightly with electrical power as she
shot a glare to the now baffled Dario and Nightmare.

     "Correction, Joey." Tony finally remarked. "Amanda seems to
be her *own* Pokemon."
     "You, Dario Dariani, have corrupted your homeworld with
these foul warped Pokemon, *using* them to harm Pokemon and
humans alike. I, Sailor Pikagirl, shall not let this go
unpunished!" The anthropomorphic Pikachu declared, brazenly
scolding her opponent. 
     "Sailor Pikagirl?" Joey blinked.
     "Folks, I've seen many a Sailor senshi in my years with PTB 
Productions," JR admitted. "But I've never seen an electric
rodent one before..."
     "*Sailor Pikagirl*," Joey repeated.

     A frantic Dario began blasting at the outraged pokemorph
with his gun.
     "Reflect," Sailor Pikagirl casually waved a hand, and a
glass-like barrier materialized in front of her as she advanced,
the bullets bouncing harmlessly off. Then, with a blinding speed,
she leapt up and drove a flying kick into Dario's chest, sending
him flailing to the ground. She stood up and turned to address
the angered Nightmare.
     "And you, Nightmare, you and your corrupted brethren have
harmed both trainers as well as your own kind. These wounded
Pokemon cry... for JUSTICE!"
     "Nightmare's setting up for another psychic onslaught," JR 
exclaimed as the green horn once again materialized on its
head. A series of narrow Psybeams zipped across the circle, but
Sailor Pikagirl merely leapt away from the incoming blasts,
coming closer to the foul black horse. One final leap
propelled her high above Nightmare... as the air around her
crackled with electrical force. 
     "Thunderbolt!" She cried out, casting her hand downward. 
Her electrical field exploded downward, smashing into the
poisonous stallion. 
     "Amanda - erm, Sailor Pikagirl's dishing out a world of
hurt,"  Joey abruptly commented, finally coming to his senses.
"That bolt stunned Nightmare. This could be it!"
     "Pikagirl's landed near the stunned stallion," Tony added 
ominously. "And-- Great Scott! What power!" Nightmare neighed in
protest as the pokemorph senshi moved her way underneath its
belly and lifted it over her head. "The kind of power we've
become accustomed to seeing from the trainers of the PFFL!"
     "Umm... no Tony, this is a first," JR reminded him, flatly. 
     "SEISMIKKU..." Sailor Pikagirl shouted, her voice suddenly
picking up an inexplicable Japanese accent. She turned and
planted her feet solidly, facing towards Dario, now struggling to
his feet. "... TOSS!!!"
     "Oh my..." Tony breathed.
     "Oh Gawd..." Joey and JR added in unison.
     
     "Oh, shit..." Dario gasped, regaining his senses just in
time to see his own mount, Nightmare, sailing toward him. The
hired gun of Rocket United was knocked out an instant later,
pinned underneath the mass of his own steed.
     "For all trainers and Pokemon hurt at the hands of these two 
fiends!" Sailor Pikagirl swore with dramatic gestures, before
snapping into a cheerful smile, complete with a V-for-Victory
hand signal. "This win's for you!" 
     
     "And *there goes the battle!*" Tony exulted, resulting in a
pair of odd looks from his cohorts. "Sailor Pikagirl advances
into the quarter-finals to face the winner of tonight's main
event." 
     "We're also seeing some of the grueling aftermath of a
Circle of Masters match," Joey winced, as Dario was hoisted onto
a gurny by a team of Chanseys. "At this rate the boring ol'
*normal* trainers may outlive their more combat-ready
counterparts...."
     "Dario does appear to have been seriously wounded," Tony
mused somberly before looking up. "But... his soul still burns."
     Jim Ross paused and turned to his rival. "What the hell are 
you talking about, Schiavone?"
     "We've still got plenty of PFFL action coming up folks,"
Tony informed the audience, ignoring JR completely. "Including
our next qualifying round match-up, where our competitors
couldn't be any *farther* opposites."

     The contemptuous and aggressive sound of Metallium's 
"Revelation" announced the arrival of a pair of uniformed young 
men. Their attire appeared to be silver variants of the standard
Team Rocket agent uniforms. The dark styled hair and trademark
jacket identified the youth walking ahead as Ryan Edgerton,
leader of Team Revelations. His younger blonde brother, Garrett,
followed behind him. Both seemed rather offended at the muffled
jeers they received as they advanced to the center ring.

     "Our next challenger, Ryan Edgerton, hails from Pallet
Town," Tony began, before turning to his colleagues, "And I'm
really perturbed at the reaction these fine young men are
receiving here in Tokyo-3 tonight, gentlemen!"
     "Well, they're self-proclaimed paragons of virtue, Tony," JR
rebutted, as Garrett argued with some of the more vocal fans. "In
fact, these kids are starting to remind me of Steve Richards back
home...." The two trainers both took up microphones, as Garrett
returned to his brother in the center of the arena's circle.
     
     "...what is *wrong* with everyone?" Garrett puzzled. "All
we're trying to do is spread the same good news that the Lord's
allowed us to present to the Kanto Island. And in a dark world
like *this*, people need something to believe in!"
     The elder Edgerton nodded somberly, listening to his younger 
brother's concerns. "I understand your concerns, Garrett," Ryan
comforted him. He then gestured to the spectators around them.
"But you must keep in mind that this city has never had warm
regard to servants of the Lord..."
     The muffled jeers reverted to a stunned, deadly silence that
loomed across the arena. Ryan peered across the appalled
audience, almost oblivious to the nature of his reference.
     
     "Ohh... wow..." Joey breathed, shaking his head.
     "I can't believe he just-- " A stunned JR groaned, just as
some odd, cliched gongs set to a faux-Chinese backbeat over the
PA... along with a rather enthusiastic announcer.
     "YES! You are the *king* of the *world*! Your dance will
save us all!" 
     "...the monkey hell?" Tony blinked.
     As the Dance Dance Revolution techno mix of "Kung Fu
Fighting" continued, an athletic and rather care-free young man
walked onto the stage, accompanied  by disco lighting that
illuminated the floor around him. He wore glasses, and his long
black hair was bound back into a ponytail that extended
to the middle of his back. His Porygon companion, Eliza hovered
by his side.
     
     "The brothers Edgerton seem to be rather taken back by Ben's
theme music," Joey snickered, as a nervous smile twitched across
Ryan's face. Garrett, too was rather taken back from the sudden
disco atmosphere of Sadamoto Auditorium.
     Ben Masters strolled down the aisle towards center stage,
noting the now much more relaxed Tokyo-3 capacity crowd, smirking
slightly as a few spectators even began to grove to the dance
music. He turned back to the brothers Edgerton as the cheering
faded.
     "Y'know what your problem is, guys?" Ben asked the Christian
youth. "Sometimes you just think *way* too much." Ryan fumed as
he took his place in the trainers box. 
     "It appears that Ryan was *not* prepared for the unorthodox
methods of his opponent, folks," Tony pondered.
     "We'll have to see if Masters can capitalize on-- Joey?" JR
stopped abruptly to glare at his ECW cohort, currently shifting
and grooving in his seat.
     "...What?"
     "No getting 'jiggy' while on duty, alright?"
     Joey sighed. "*Fine.* In any event it's time to start the
match..."
     "Y'all ready?" Ben called out to his opponent across the
circle. "Let's Go!"

Ryan Edgerton vs Ben Masters
Standard League Rules

     "Ben starts the match by using a virtual monster," Tony
wondered as Eliza hovered out into the ring. "Gentlemen, is using
a Digimon *legal* in a *Pokemon* match-up?
     "Despite the similarities, Tony, Porygon *is* a Pokemon,"
Joey reminded him. "Granted, the only data type one on the
Islands."
     "Ryan seems to be taking a traditional route to face this
unique Pokemon, going with little Fire-Type Pokemon, Charmander."
     The two Pokemon circled one another, readying themselves for
the attack...
     
     "Charmander's first on the offensive, rushing in to Scratch
Porygon!" Tony exclaimed as the red lizard rushed in.
     "...but Porygon hovers out of harm's way, using his mobility
advantage," Joey analyzed. Eliza looped upwards and back...
before swinging back and then forward to ram into Charmander with
a Tackle!
     "Solid hit knocks Ryan's Charmander off it's feet, but it
rocks back up," JR remarked. "They just seem to be testing one
another right now."

     "Charmander, cleanse her ignorance with fire!" Ryan
proclaimed confidently.
     The little Charmander's eyes narrowed with determination as
his flames on his tail flared to life. Then, with flicks of its
tail, the little dragon flung Embers of flame at the virtual
Pokemon. Eliza recoiled from the initial fiery bursts backing
towards its master.
     "Alright, time for a change, Eliza! Literally!" Ben
remarked, reaching up and tapping the air in front of him, as if
using a keyboard.
     "Affirmative," Eliza replied, much to the surprise of Ryan
and Garrett. As Charmander launched it's next fiery assault,
Eliza's polygonal "limbs" snapped downward, while its torso
arched up. Just before the second volley of Embers connected,
Eliza's shiny finish shifted from white and pink into a clear
crystal clear blue.

     "Charmander's second fiery attack seems to have *no
effect!*" Tony commented in surprise.
     "Quite apparent from how Eliza is just standing there,
really," JR added flatly.
     "That's the updated version of one of Porygon's trademarks,
Conversion 2," Joey informed.
     "With AOL IM?" Tony wondered. Joey continued, ignoring
Tony's question.
     "...which switches the users type to one that resists the
attacks that it previously took. In this case, Water."
     "--Which mean's Ryan could be in a world of pain!" JR
interrupted, as the now Water-based Porygon sailed in to Tackle
the unsuspecting Charmander, crying out as it rammed into him,
then swooped in for another ram.
     "You have to wonder what Ryan E makes of someone else
Converting *his* Pokemon!" Joey chuckled. 
     "... aren't you too Extreme for puns?" JR grumbled back at
him. 

     "Quick, shroud its vision, Charmander, with Smokescreen!"
Ryan ordered. The lizard Pokemon nodded rushing about the circle
as its tail ignited into a thick grey smoke.
     "Excellent ploy by Edgerton here," Tony affirmed, as Eliza
slowed its charge as it entered the Smokescreen. "Making it
harder for Charmander's digital opponent to attack."
     "She's having problems getting her bearing in all that...
and the little dragon's leaping in from behind," JR exclaimed as
Charmander hopped up from behind to grab onto the back of Eliza.
     "OH! And it's raking into it's virtual hide with its hind
claws!" Joey winced as Charmander ripped into Porygon with a
velocirapor-esque Slash attack.

     Ryan smiled confidently as his Charmander leapt gracefully
of the back of the now sputtering Eliza. She was barely managing
to stay in the air,  and turned weakly to face her master.
     "You can't give up now..." Ben pleaded. "You're an
unstoppable fighting machine!" Eliza and her trainer gazed at one
another, before the Porygon rose up, hovering with more
confidence.
     "... affirmative," Eliza nodded, before spinning around back
into the Smokescreen, her voice steadying with confidence.
"Targeting system, engaged."

     "Doesn't look like Ryan was prepared for this tactic,
folks," Tony informed. "Ben is once more utilizing a brand new
move..."
     "Eliza appears to be Locking On to the little dragon,
Edgerton doesn't seem to notice..." JR added tensely.
     "Charmander, burn that digital abomination!" Ryan ordered.
The fire dragon Pokemon growled softly and opened its mouth to
unleash a Flamethrower... just as Eliza's head and her two feet
disengaged and began spinning around her torso. Then, each
detached shape blasted forth one of a trio of rays: one crackling
with electricity, another of searing heat, and the final one an
arctic blast.
     "PERFECT! Too perfect!" Ben exclaimed as the Charmander
flailed back and collapsed to the ground, reeling from the Tri
Attack. Eliza's limbs stopped rotating and snapped back into
their original position.

     "...Ben has landed the first strike!" Tony called out. "We
could see another upset here tonight!"
     "Don't be too hasty, Tony," Joey warned. "Masters' has two
more to go through and he's at a handicap with just two Pokemon."
Ryan retreated his unconscious Charmander while drawing out
another Pokeball.
     "Geodude, I choose you."
     A red beam shimmered from the Christian trainer's Pokeball,
and solidified into a hovering anthropomorphic grey boulder, a
focused frown across its face as it cracked its knuckles. The
stony Pokemon hovered over to the recovering Porygon and began
throwing jabs into its torso.
     "Ryan's rock-steady Pokemon is already on the offensive!
Body blow!" Joey yelled out. The Porygon floated back, dodging
Geodude's powerful swipes, as her surfaces distorted into a dull
grey.
     "Look's like ol' Eliza's going for its Conversion defense."
JR noticed. "Switching to Rock form to suck up some of its
punches--"
     "Rend the earth asunder, Geodude!" Ryan commanded
dramatically.
     "GEO!" The boulder shaped Pokemon sneered as it faked a left
hook... then suddenly dove and drove its fist into the ground!
The arena floor rumbled before a blast of earth and debris
erupted beneath the shocked Porygon, sparks and energy crackling
off with each strike!

     "Critical hit!" Tony announced. "Porygon's defeat has
strengthened Ryan's soul!" 
     Jim Ross groaned at Tony's enthusiasm.
     "... he's been doing that all week. It's driving me crazy!"
Joey explained, gesturing to his WCW cohort.
     "And Eliza's sudden defeat leaves Ben down to his last
monster," JR mentioned, recovering from Tony's exclamations.
"Masters will have to pull out some heavy artillery to defeat
Edgerton."

     The bespectacled trainer unsummoned Eliza, then pulled
his remaining Pokeball from his belt. He gave it a slight toss
into the air, then turned and grinned over to his confident
uniformed opponent. "This Pokemon... shall be a future legend!"
     He held the opening Pokeball forward dramatically, summoning
a rather massive bear-like Pokemon, slouched lazily on its
side...

     "Well, you got the 'heavy' part right, Jim," Joey exclaimed.
"They don't come any larger than Snorlax!"
     "Granted, I'm not sure what Ben plans on doing with a
sleeping Pokemon," Tony shrugged, as Geodude began his attack.
The earth-based Pokemon drove its fists into the ground, setting
off multiple Magnitudes beneath the massive Snorlax.  The
slumbering Pokemon seemed unmoved by the muffled explosions, and
had no reaction more violent than snoring slightly and rolling
over onto his other side. 
     "Your earthly weapons are useless against Snorlax's
resilient hide!" Ben proclaimed confidently, as the frustrated
Geodude hoisted a clod of rock beneath itself, and threw it
towards its opponent. Ryan Edgerton fumed as the Rock Throw
impacted and fell off of the sleeping Pokemon's massive gut.  
     "This Snorlax is unstoppable!" Tony cried out in feigned
fright. "It *feels no pain!*" 
     "It's also *not doing anything!*" Joey countered,
frustrated both with partner's commentary and the slow match.
     "Mah Gawd, it's a no-selling machine..." JR uttered.

     "Distasteful," Ryan shook his head. "Raising such a
*slothful* Pokemon."
     "I prefer the term *serene*, Ryan," Ben called back. "But
beware! Behind it's peaceful slumber rests a fighting dynamo!"
     Geodude braced himself into the ground, fuming at his
oblivious target, then started a swift tumbling spin towards his
opponent.
     "Geodude with a Roll-Out! He's gathering momentum..." JR
commented with anticipation.
     "Yogi better move there- hell, better do *anything* before 
Geodude--" Joey's protests were interrupted as the Snorlax opened 
it's mouth and let out a deep yawn, resulting in an
arena-rumbling Snore! The resounding noise knocked Geodude from
its spin, causing it to collide weakly into Snorlax's side.
     "...and Snorlax is finally awake!" Tony announced, as the
rotund Pokemon lurched upright.
     "*What?*" Joey yelled back, still deafened by the Snore. The
Edgerton brothers rubbed their ears in discomfort, turning back
to the action.
     "Now, witness the ultimate Pokemon combat machine!  Snorlax,
show them your singular style!" Ben cried out, as Snorlax mumbled
and looked around with tired eyes. The massive Pokemon sank back
down on his side.... 
     The dazed Geodude had just recovered from Snorlax's sonic
assault and looked upward as a shadow passed over it... in time
to see Snorlax's massive flank bearing down to land on top of
him!
     "Oh God!" Joey raved. "Devastating Body Slam as Snorlax
crushes the rock Pokemon. Ben may pull this off yet!"
     "And now..." Ben gestured dramatically. "...The Ultimate
Technique!"
     Snorlax shifted on the ground, further grinding the Geodude
pressed beneath its side into the floor. Then, a broad and
content smile crossed its snout as it returned to its slumber.
     "... dude," the crushed boulder Pokemon groaned as it passed
out, and a second "X" appeared above Ryan's profile on the
jumbotron screen.

     "...It appears to be Resting," Tony blinked.
     "As it's done most of this match." Joey added with a
defeated laugh.
     "Feels kinda like watchin' Rikishi in the ring," JR
shrugged.
     "Ryan's down to his last Pokemon," Tony informed the
audience. "What can he *possibly* do to stop this slumbering
powerhouse?" Ryan ran a hand through his carefully-styled dark
hair before drawing his final Pokeball. The crimson beam shot
forth... and a small centipede Pokemon with a spike on its
forehead materialized into existence, looking up at its towering
opponent.
     "Weedle," It mewed with determination.
     "...it's a bug," JR noted flatly. "He's going to face off
against that massive bear with a *bug*."
     "A baby bug," Joey added. "Weedle's the weak larval stage of
Beedrill." 
     "It's boiled down to Ryan's David against Ben Masters'
Goliath in a Poke-battle of biblical proportions!" Tony
proclaimed.
     Joey Styles just shook his head. "... I can't believe you
said that with a straight face." 

     The vigilant Weedle scurried across the arena circle and 
rammed its spiked forehead into Snorlax's rotund thigh.
     "Mrph?" Stirred from its sleep, it looked down at the little
bug Pokemon in tired annoyance. The drowsy Pokemon grumbled and
drove a massive paw towards Weedle. The bug narrowly jumped back 
and spit out gooey String Shot from its unseen mouth, the silken
strand wrapping solidly around Snorlax's wrist!
     The baffled Snorlax lifted his entangled paw up, hoisting
Weedle up along with it. 
     "...Weedle's the first on the offensive," Tony uttered with 
a hint of confusion. With a shift of momentum, Weedle swung over
to land on top of Snorlax's large belly. The bear-like Pokemon
grumbled in protest, reaching to grab the bug with his free paw.
Weedle skittered out of the way and made its way up Snorlax's
arm, leaving more strands of sticky webbing in its wake....

     "...and it's taking the fight to Snorlax," JR uttered with
equal disbelief. 
    Weedle stuck another length of String Shot onto 
Snorlax's shoulder, emitting a little 'thwp' noise as he did so,
and slid back down to the arena floor. The once-drowsy Pokemon
was now fully awake, emitting low growls of frustration at the
gooey bonds that were wrapped securely around its paws.
     "Bring the giant down, Weedle," Ryan commanded, watching
his trademark Pokemon go to work. The insect spit another String
Shot around Snorlax's ankle, and gradually began skittering
around his stumbling opponent.
     "Oh... my... GOD! And it takes the big monster down!" Joey
blinked in surprise as Snorlax's feet were pulled together,
prompting him to topple over face first. 
     Ben Masters looked on, dumbfounded, as Ryan's Weedle
proceeded to climb on top his downed Snorlax's back and ram its
spiked head into the flailing Pokemon's hide. Several tedious
minutes and multiple Poison Stings later, the Snorlax finally
succumbed to Weedle's improbable onslaught and passed out.

     "And Ryan wins the match!" Tony exclaimed. "After what
has been a truly back-and-forth series of events!"
     "... we just watched a Snorlax get punked by a Weedle,
guys," Joey reiterated, rightfully stunned.
     "Ryan did pull off a narrow victory tonight, but I get the
feeling we haven't seen the last of Ben Masters," JR foretold. 
"That boy can go a long way if he fights trainers that don't have
Weedles." 
     "But coming up next, on the Pokemon Fan Fic League!" Tony
noted without skipping a beat. "Ryan's next opponent will be 
determined, will it be the mysterious Adauchi or the spunky and 
empowered youth, Skye Dreame."
     "It's all coming at ya after the break," Joey concluded. He 
suddenly raised a hand intently onto his earpiece, and waved to
the camera. "Hold up, there seems to be something going on
outside the arena...."

     The scene cut abruptly to the sidewalks of Tokyo-3, just
outside of the arena. Frantic squawking could be heard as the
camera panned over to a trio of children, Junior-level Pokemon
trainers from the looks of their hats and attire. They were
trying vigilantly to add to their collection, the capturing beams
of their Pokeballs narrowly missing their prey: an irate penguin
with a pair of red tufts of hair flowing from its brow and a
metal collar around its neck.  
     "WAUGH!" it yelped in protest, scrambling between a pair of 
junior trainers. The trio took off after the odd little
penguin... before their prey scrambled behind the legs of an
annoyed young woman, clothed casually in denim jeans, t-shirt,
and an official-looking red uniform jacket. The purple haired
lady leveled an stern glare at the kids.
     "For the *last* time, you *can't capture Pen-Pen!*" Misato 
protested.
     The dejected trio walked off, as Misato Katsuragi tromped
over to rejoin her young ward and Third Child, Shinji Ikari.
"Honestly, having such a promotion during a time like this seems
incredibly risky." 
     "I don't know," Shinji shrugged. "It's kind of nice to get
to see other kids outside of school, and these strange creatures
give Pen-Pen someone to make friends with. Isn't that right, Q?"
The young boy looked down at the brown bipedal creature tagging
along by him. It stood roughly up to Shinji's thigh, and turned
his skull-helmed head up to him with a nervous but friendly look
in its eyes.
     "Cu-Bone!" it replied awkwardly, but happily.
     Pen-Pen fumed the best a hot weather penguin could and
walked closer alongside Misato.

     "Well if you want *my* opinion," a third, indignant 
female voice added, "this was a bad idea from the start." Shinji
and Misato turned toward the third member of their party, a red
haired girl Shinji's age, who was wearing denim shorts and a
light jacket. She was sitting with her feet propped up on a
street side bench, waiting for her friends to get back.

     "Having all these *children* milling about Tokyo-3 is an
obvious security hazard," Asuka remarked, then peered with
contempt at Shinji's Pokemon companion. "And all these creatures
wandering the streets is a sanitation problem to say the least."
     "Puff," A voice beneath her bench agreed with equal
indignation. An ivory white ball with stubby legs and arms walked
into view. The haughty Jigglypuff narrowed her huge blue eyes at
the embarrassed Cubone, just as Asuka addressed her associate
Shinji.

     "You might want to ditch the dirtball there, Ikari," She 
continued, oblivious to her new companion. "We wouldn't want to
*catch* anything, you know." 
     "Jig-gly." Jigglypuff smirked, giving the Cubone a
dismissive wave.
     "Actually, Shinji, she has a point," Misato added in
reluctant agreement. "We just found that little guy at random. He
could belong to someone."
     "I suppose you're right," Shinji sighed, dejected.
     "Cu..." The Cubone sighed along with him.
     "Hey, he can tag along until we reach the arena, I'm sure
some of  those 'Joys' will know what to do with him," Misato
assured.
     Shinji nodded in agreement and took Cubone's free hand. He
and Misato, with their respective animal companions in tow,
advanced toward the arena. Asuka and Jigglypuff paused to watch
the departing group.
     "Strange, strange people," Asuka shook her head in thought, 
as she murmured aloud.
     "Puff," The balloon Pokemon agreed with a roll of her eyes.

     The scene faded back to the announcer's desk. The trio
of commentators regarded their monitors with baffled looks.
     "...huh," Tony remarked.
     " We'd like to thank the production crew in the back for
that insightful interlude...." JR began, dryly.
     "Tokyo-3's apparently a fitting venue for these events,"
Joey remarked. "Comes equipped with its own incoherent segues.
Perhaps WCW would be interested?"

     Tony Schivone glanced coldly at his ECW counterpart before 
changing the subject. "Coming up next in the PFFL tournament, a
clash of contrasting styles. The edgy and downright brooding
persona of Shigeru Adauchi and the spritely young lady, Skye
Dream.
     "Mike Tenay's catching some words with the young girl before
the match in the back. Mike?" JR called, promptly cutting the
scene to Mike Tenay. A perky pre-teen girl was bouncing with glee
at his side. She wore her soft black hair in a pony tail, and was
dressed in an outfit similar to Misty: short denim shorts and a
midriff-exposing red top.
     
     "So, Skye, you seem to be anxiously waiting your
qualifying match up against Adauchi," Tenay noted. "Are you
anxious about your first major League match?"
     "Oh, you bet!" Skye nodded. "I'm so nervous, my first match
is against... against *him*! That billowing trenchcoat, that cute
red ponytail, those *fresh* glasses..." The young girl all but
swooned, a blissful smile forming on her lips as her thoughts
drifted onto the mysterious hitman.
     The opening rhythms of Godsmack's "Keep Away" blared from 
outside, and Skye giggled in anticipation as she scampered over
to her trainer's box. 
     "We go back to the action in the arena," Tenay concluded,
"Back out to you guys..."

     The scene snapped back to the arena floor, where the
trenchcoat-clad Adauchi strode single-mindedly down toward his
trainer's box.
     "Shigeru Adauchi hails from the same universe as current
PFFL quarter-finalist Satoshi and the recently-eliminated Dario
Dariani," Tony informed. "And judging from his sidearm there, we
could have *another* violent situation on our hands here soon!"
     "Adauchi definitely seems more combat oriented than Satoshi,
that's for sure," JR added.  "The question is, will he be as much
of a low-down snake as Dario proved himself to be?"
     "And if he is, will Skye be able to handle herself as well
as Amanda did?" Joey nodded back to his cohort. "It'll be
interesting to see how his power oriented tactics match 
up against--" he began, before being interrupted by the 
opening beats of Brittany Spear's "Oops, I Did It Again."

     The trio turned in unison to watch the perky pre-teen girl
skip down the ramp, smiling coyly and blowing kisses at the
nearby spectators.
     "His contender is Skye Dream," Joey informed, at a loss for 
words. "And they have an interesting dress code for little girls
on Indigo Island."
     "Gee, Joey," Tony smirked. "I'd figure your league would be 
accustomed to such 'fan service'."
     "Our fanservice is old enough to vote, Schiavone. How old
is Skye... ten, eleven?"
     "... I'm choosing not to think about that, Styles." JR
declared.

     The dark haired trainer took her place opposite of Adauchi
and readied herself for the match...

SHIGERU ADAUCHI vs SKYE DREAM
Standard League Rules

     "Skye Dreame is a novice Water-trainer from Cereluean City,"
Joey remarked. "It'll be interesting to see how she fares again a
seasoned pro who's known for his skill and ruthlessness."
     Skye tossed out her first Pokemon with a dramatic pirouette.
"Go, Flareon!"
     The fiery, foxlike Pokemon materialized in front of
the spunky youth.
     "... you said she was a Water trainer," JR noted dryly,
glancing over to Joey.
     "... well, it says here she's a Junior trainer at Cerulean
City Gym..." Joey stammered.
     "Perhaps she multi-classed?" Tony suggested.
     "I have to wonder about Adauchi's training prowess here,
guys," Joey pondered. "As imposing figure as he may be, going
into a standard match with less Pokemon than your opponent isn't
that wise...."

     The hitman arched an eyebrow at the fiery canine Pokemon,
regarded his own Pokeballs, and then casually toggled the release
switch on one. It released a massive burst of light that
solidified into the familiar and massive shape of the rock-based
serpent, Onix.
     "Mah Gawd... Adauchi's evened the numbers game with *size*
and *power*...." JR uttered.
      The beast rolled it's stony segmented neck down to regard
the nervous Flareon. Skye Dream edged back in awe.
     "Oh my... it's huge..."
     Tony was in caught in mid-sip, and tried desperately not to
cough up his coffee.
     "I did not just hear that." Joey laughed weakly.
     "Nope." JR added simply.

     Skye regained her senses and peered up to the massive Onix. 
"Flareon, let's wear him down. Start off with some Smog!"
     "Flareon's showing off some impressive speed, easily dodging
that stone serpent's massive tail,"  Tony noted as the Onix
slowly Slammed its tail against the ground, attempting to strike
the flame-based Eevee. Its mane erupted into a fiery grey smoke
as it circled the earth-based Pokemon.
     "And its kickin' in the afterburners! Sound move from Skye 
here," JR noted, as the Smog rose up towards the coughing Onix.
"Big as that fella is, it still needs to breathe."
     Adauchi narrowed his eyes up to the increasingly pained
Onix, then pointed a single finger at the ground. In response,
the massive serpent nodded and rushed its head downward, bursting
through the arena's metal flooring and into the earth that lay
beneath it. Soon, the rock dragon's entire body had slithered out
of sight. 

     A resounding rumbling filled the arena, as Skye and her
Flareon looked wildly around them.
     "Ohhh, God," Joey worried, "It's a Dig attack...."
     "And with something that size...." Tony breathed.
     "INCOMING!" JR yelled.
     Second later, the Onix erupted from the ground beneath the
fiery Pokemon. The force of the charge launched him slightly
airborne, and the rock Pokemon managed an impressively agile spin
before landing on the floor with a stadium shaking thump. Skye's
Flareon was unconscious before it even landed at the on the
ground in front of her.
     "Flareon's taken down in one blow!" Tony enthused.
     "Thankfully, Skye's not discouraged by this onslaught," JR 
informed as she blipped the wounded Flareon back into her
Pokeball and withdrew her second one. "Go, Sapphire!"
     "Skye Dreame's switching over to her preferred element,"
Tony informed as a Squirtle leapt into existence from the
pokeball's shimmering ray. "...and is immediately on the
offensive!
      "Sapphire, show them our strength! Water Gun!"
     "Squirtle begins its opening assault with a breath weapon,
an even stream of water!" Tony enthused.
     "The massive Onix is vulnerable to that element, Tony," Joey 
added, as the stream connected, splashing against the rocky hide
of the agitated Onix. "Though I doubt its enough to take that
monster down."
     "Indeed, Skye's just makin' it angry-- and HERE IT COMES!"
JR yelped as Onix rammed its head squarely into the ground,
unleashing a tidal wave of rock and debris towards the horrified
Squirtle.
     "Sapphire, Withdraw now!" Skye cried out. The vigilant
turtle drew into its shell, weathering the barrage of stone and
gravel slamming across the length of the ring. Each jolt sent the
Withdrawn Squirtle flying about and finally high into the air.
     "Quickly, use Bubblebeam!"
     "Skye's unloading another barrage of aquatic power onto the
giant earth Pokemon!" Tony exclaimed.
     "Sapphire's whiddling him down gradually." JR observed.
Adauchi clenched a gloved fist and pointed into the air. "Onix is
coiling up..."
     "And he just sprang into the air for a Strength Attack!"
Joey yelped as the granite serpent surged into the air with
unexpected grace."Lots of agility for an animated bundle of
rocks." 
     "And the turtle's barely avoiding getting gored in mid air--
he's managed to grab on to its horn...." Tony cheered
breathlessly.

     "Now, Blizzard!" Skye cried out triumphantly.
     Sapphire squinted and began concentrating. Inexplicably,
snow and near arctic winds consumed the two Pokemon in mid air. 
Surprised gawks filled the arena, most noticeable on Adauchi, the 
announcing crew, and Onix himself. 
     A solidified and crystalized Onix landed on the ground with
a clank, and Sapphire scampered triumphantly off of its head.
     "And a critical hit falls the mighty Onix!" Tony feigned
genuine enthusiasm with gusto.
     "Her Squirtle just threw a Blizzard..." Joey stated in
disbelief.

     "Onix is frozen solid, and as such it's a damn safe bet
that he's unable to continue," JR announced. "Adauchi's going for
his second and *final* Pokemon!"
     "He's going to have to pull out something impressive to
finish this bout, guys," Tony added. The hitman regarded his
remaining Pokeball, while recalling his frozen Onix. He casually
detached it from his holster and summoned his remaining Pokemon:
a bipedal brown humanoid, standing roughly five feet tall. It
started an exceptional kata of kicks before settling into a
powerful horse stance.
     "Adauchi's going with Hitmonlee, a formidable Fighting
type-- and there it goes!" Joey yelped as Hitmonlee immediately
leapt to the attack.
     "And Sapphire wasn't excepting such speed... it's on the 
defensive," JR commented ominously as the martial arts Pokemon
unleashed a flurry of side kicks, staggering the Squirtle back
towards the field's perimeter. 
     "Hitmonlee ducks into a tumbling roll! ORELE!" Tony
exclaimed.
     "Only this attack actually *does* something-- leaping spin 
kick!" Joey exclaimed as Hitmonlee finished off the Rolling Kick, 
launching the dazed Squirtle up and out of bounds. 
     "Such power..." Skye swooned, half enviously.
     "That eliminates Sapphire!" Tony proclaimed. "The trainers
are down to one Pokemon a piece." Skye bounced slightly on the
balls of her feet, smiling winsomely at Adauchi as she withdrew
her remaining Pokemon. The silent terrorist regarded her with a
dismissive stone-faced glare... which switched to a frown of
concern as a golden skinned humanoid Pokemon materialized in
front of his fighting Pokemon.
     "KADABRA!"
     "Okay, remind me why the novice water trainer has a powerful 
Psychic type?" Joey inquired.
     "Maybe she's *really* multi-classed," Tony replied,
sounding slightly less certain.

     The two humanoids paced around the circle, carefully
regarding their next move.
     "This isn't good for Adauchi..." JR informed. "Not only can 
Psychics suck up most of what Hitmonlee can dish out, they put a 
world of hurt on Fighters..."
     "But that's not going to stop Hitmonlee from trying." Joey 
interrupted as the fighting Pokemon dashed up to strike. 
     "Kadabra, Reflect!" Skye cheered. Kadabra leapt and floated 
slightly in mid-air, entwining his legs into the lotus position. 
Hitmonlee's knee bashes rammed harmlessly against a sphere of
force surrounding the golden Psychic Pokemon.
     "He's already turning on the ESP," JR warned, as Kadabra
raised a clawed hand, consumed by a purple aura of power. With an
almost casual wave, he lashed out and flung Hitmonlee back into
the middle of the ring.
     
     "Adauchi's not out yet! Hitmonlee leaps to his feet,
Kadabra's floating towards him and the fighter's ready with some
punches!" Tony cheered.
     "Varying his attacks *might* prove useful." Joey noted. "As 
Hitmonlees are better known for their formidable kicks."
     "Neither forms of attack are working so far though," JR 
intervened, "As Kadabra's swatting his strikes away with *insane* 
speed... and he grabbed Hitmonlee's fist!"
     "He lashes out and... oh dear, Kadabra's grabbed his other
hand," Tony added ominously.
     "Kadabra's ready for some psychic smackdown..." Joey uttered
as Kadabra's eyes lit up... before Hitmonlee grabbed a hold of
his wrists and rolled back. "No! He's rolling into a monkey
flip... using those powerful legs to *send Kadabra airborne!*"

     "Hitmonlee braces himself for a leap... and springs up for a
High Jump Kick!" JR exclaimed. The brown humanoid Pokemon shot up
and extended his leg. Kadabra regained his senses and hung in mid
air. He brought his clawed hands together and focused on the
incoming Fighting Pokemon.

     "Ready..." Skye called in anticipation. "...now, Kadabra!
Mind Shock!"
     Kadabra separated his claws, a crackling ball of purple
energy materializing between them. He thrust his claws forward,
launching the energy ball at the incoming Hitmonlee. The Fighter
barely had time to look shocked before being blasted by the
psychic ball, and was flung hard by the exploding shockwave of
telekinetic force. Hitmonlee crashed to the ground, shortly
followed by Kadabra.

     "That's not a standard Psychic attack, is it?" JR asked 
incredulously.
     "Well, if this wasn't Dragonball Z meets Hello Kitty
before...." Joey mused in shock.
     "Kadabra's playing hardball now, folks," Tony warned in a
hushed tone. "He's readying a telekinetic attack..."
     Skye's golden pokemon glowed with violet aura, and clods of
earth rose up into the air around him. With a gesture, the chunks
of rock sailed toward the recovering Hitmonlee. 

     "Hitmonlee's doing his damnedest to dodge this barrage!" JR 
uttered, as Adauchi's fighting Pokemon wove and ducked... then
the announcers and the crowd audibly winced as a clod of earth
smashed into Hitmonlee's raised knee! A second rock slammed into
his head, and Hitmon was flung painfully across the ring,
skidding just barely before the field's outer perimeter.
     
     Skye Dreame's smile brightened, and she blushed as she
glanced over toward Adauchi. "Hee... sorry..."
     "Young Skye seems to be redefining 'tough love' here
tonight, folks," Tony pondered.
     "That girl's not right...." JR sighed with a shake of his
head.

     Hitmonlee lurched back to his feet, favoring his knee 
considerably... before finally shifting his weight, and  
straightening his leg with an audible and slightly nauseating
pop. He rose back to his full height, leveling a cold glare at
Kadabra. Hitmonlee lifted one of his three-fingered hands up, 
beckoning his opponent with a simple gesture.
     "Hardcore Hong Kong action Pokemon...." Joey breathed in
shock. "...damn."

     Kadabra clenched his claws and summoned another sphere of
energy between his hands, while Hitmonlee dropped back into the
horse stance. The air began circulating at increased strength
around Hitmonlee's focusing body.
     "Both Pokemon seem to be gathering energy," Tony uttered
tensely. "Kadabra's readying another Mind Shock, Hitmonlee's 
Focusing..."
     "Ka... KADABRA!" The golden psychic Pokemon launched the
crackling sphere towards his opponent! With blinding speed, 
Hitmonlee dashed off to the side. Kadabra narrowed his eyes, 
willing the crackling ball of psychic energy to follow....
     "The Mind Shock's gaining distance... and Hitmonlee leaps
high into the air!" JR exclaimed as the brown humanoid sailed
into the air, the Mind Shock darting after him. Hitmonlee's
glorious
leap was sending him right towards Kadabra.
     "Hitmonlee's on a collision course!" Tony cried out, "He's
going in for a... no?! He simply landed in front of him and
jumped again!"
     "And the Mind Shock's following... oh dear," Joey's eyes
went wide, as did Kadabra's, as the crackling ball of energy
impacted into the psychic Pokemon's armor-plated carapace! "Oh my
god! The old homing backfire trick!"
     "The Fighting Pokemon lands, spins...." JR called out.
Hitmonlee set his sights on his staggering opponent. With a quick
leap, he closed in on Kadabra, cupped a hand around the back of
his horned head, and pulled it down for a knee bash. A second
knee to the midsection lifted Kadabra off his feet, and a final
sharp, high snap kick sent the wounded Psychic Pokemon flying 
outside the ring's edge.
     "MEGA KICK! Mega Kick from Hitmonlee!" Tony proclaimed. The 
previously hushed crowd broke into a thunderous ovation for the 
vigilant Hitmonlee's victory. His leg remained upright, straight
and locked vertically over his head. A moment later, he finally
set it back to the ground and bowed formally to Kadabra, to Skye,
then to the grandstands. 

     "That was a hellacious brawl of a Pokemon battle,
gentlemen," JR breathed.
     "Yeah," Joey sighed with a slight smile, "Two powerful bad
asses going all out. All it was missing was hours of staring."
     "Both Skye and Adauchi are coming out to check on their 
respective Pokemon," Tony informed, as the two trainers wandered
out.
     
     "Wow... Kadabra never had such a fierce fight, Adauchi-san."
Skye complimented him in an awed tone. Kadabra struggled up to
its feet and hobbled over to her side. "I was wondering..."
     Adauchi gazed flatly down at her through his sunglasses.
Hitmonlee approached next to him, regarding Skye with a
disgruntled snort.
     "... could I have your autograph?" She finished cutely,
whipping out a small book and pen, grinning shyly.
     A long pause ensued in which neither the brooding hitman nor
the energetic fangirl dared to move. 
     Then, with his usual silent precision, Adauchi reached
forward to take the book and pen, much to Skye's delight.

     "Yes, dear viewers, even after a grueling Pokebattle, love 
prevails!" Tony proclaimed, somewhat misty eyed.
     "Try fangirl-ism, Tony." JR rebutted.
     "Well at least she hasn't--"
     "WAI!!" Joey's quip was abruptly interrupted by the
enthusiastic Skye's cheer, as she hopped and cheered while
cuddling her signature book.  Hitmonlee cast a silent, confused
glance up at his trainer, who merely shrugged back down at him.
     "Jinxed it, Styles," JR smirked over to the pained ECW 
commentator as he rubbed his aching ears.
     "We'll be back with our main event! Garrett Edgerton vs
Crystal Dagger, right after this!..." Tony dismissed as the
screen faded to commercial.

     One year ago, in Tokyo-3.
     The youthful guardians and caretakers of the 3A, the Powers
That Be, set up a coup at Interslam: Mind Games to rid their
world of Dark Sonic once and for all.
     It failed.

     Now, they faced Dark Sonic, his foul magic restored and 
confronting the Powers in the now abandoned arena. Several
sections of seats had already blown away in the mystical melee, 
and the three beings gleamed with power, readying themselves for
a final assault.
     "EGO CRUSHER!" The two youths called out.
     "Counterspell," Dark Sonic scoffed, causing the column of 
mystical might to vanish in a puff of logic.
     The two Powers had a momentary look of shock... as the view
cut to an aerial shot of Tokyo-3, as the arena and the
neighboring buildings are consumed by a growling dome of black
crackling power. Then, the scene freezes abruptly, as a
slightly nasally female voice with a Bronx accent is heard over
the carnage.
     "This is how 3A could have ended."
     
     Cut to the center of the fading Black Ultima. Dark Sonic's 
silhouette is coming into view, and his laughter can be heard.
     "AH HAA HAAA HA-- The hell!?" The black hedgehog was aghast
when the blinding explosion faded... to reveal an auditorium of
3A contenders, guests, and anime stars, congregating casually.
     "See, while you did have your magical strength restored."
The woman's voice over continued. "I saw nowhere saying that
you'd have the ability to use them."
     Cut to a view behind a large office chair and desk, an irate
Dark Sonic tromping about.
     "But the Black Ultima! The arena...!"
     "OPTICAL ILLUSION!" The woman in the chair proclaimed. "What
you *thought* was a Black Ultima was, in fact, a mass teleport...
and I'll have you know finding accommodations for all these
people was *quite* the hassle..."

     The view fades back to the office, and the lush office chair 
spins to reveal a petite young woman with a shiny and gaudy
silver jacket and short dress, her head cropped with messy black
hair. "So, the 3A is saved. That day... was a BRAND NEW DAY!
Check out 3A: The Mally Era, starring the original Power That
Is... me! Tuesday's on EBN, check out The Best of the Author
Avatar Association. Even ol' Dark Sonic found something to do
during the down time..."
     "Two words that will alter the rebellion movement
forever..." 
     Dark Sonic abruptly snarled, a close up of his feral grin
filling the screen. Sonya and the original Sonic were then shown
standing, confused, nervously holding electric guitars.
     "SONIC UNDERGROUND!" The camera zoomed back, showing Dark
Sonic at an impressive drum set as he banged out a steady barrage
of beats...

     "Welcome back to the Pokemon Fan Fic League!" JR welcomed
the audience, as Metallium's "Revelation" once again resonated
throughout the Sadamoto Auditorium. The younger, blonde Edgerton
brother was once again advancing down the rampway towards the 
arena floor. "You're just in time for our feature bout: Garrett 
Edgerton is going to attempt to add another notch into the
winner's column for Team Revelation."
     "Garret's showing quite a bit a guts here coming out by
himself, guys, " Joey noticed. "Considering both his first
appearance *and* who he's facing tonight."
     "He faces his toughest challenge tonight, a match-up that 
continues an ever-going battle between the Ryan Edgerton's holy
team of Pokemon trainers and the nefarious Team Rocket," Tony
informed ominously as the arena's lights died out. Several
spotlights began to pan the arena as Rob Zombie's "Spookshow
Baby" blared throughout  the auditorium. "...and here comes the
lovely but *deadly* assassin Crystal Dagger! You never know
*where* she'll be!"
     "Granted, her control of the house lighting helps when she's 
sneaking around...." JR pondered, looking about the darkened
arena.
     "Regardless, Garrett's going to have his hands full
against-- " Joey began, until the lights came up... and he
noticed the black blade of a long sword leveled steadily between
himself and Tony Schivone. The trio yelped and spun to look up to
the owner of the sword: an armor-clad woman with icy beauty and
flowing raven black hair. She was poised gracefully on the ledge
behind the commentator's desk. She glowered down to the three men
before sheathing her sword and, with a short and graceful
somersault, leapt down to the arena floor and walked with
determination to her trainer's box.
     "... how the hell did she do that in plate mail?!" Joey
protested, looking from the ledge behind him to the floor in
front of him.
     "Which looked rather snug," Tony noted. "You'd think that
would chafe...."
     "It doesn't look like Crystal Dagger's wasting any time,
as she draws her first Pokemon for this main event!" JR announced
as the camera cut to the in-ring action.

MAIN EVENT
CRYSTAL DAGGER vs GARRETT EDGERTON
Standard League Rules

     "Our femme fatale's first Pokemon of choice is..." Tony
arched a brow to examine the humanoid Pokemon in the ring. "...an
opera singer?"
     "Actually, Schiavone, that's Jynx," Joey informed his
cohort, as the portly dress-wearing Pokemon glared coldly at the
Team Revelation member, flicking a lock of her flowing blonde
hair over her shoulder. "Crystal Dagger's specialty seems to be 
the use of humanoid Pokemon."
     "Garrett's summoning his first monster," JR noted, as a pale
pink blob materialized in front of Jynx. It promptly began
morphing, its shape distorting until it was a perfect duplicate
of its icy female opponent. "It's a Ditto, which immediately goes
for its default Transform tactic."
     "Garrett now has an opera singer too..." Tony blinked.

     "Both Jynxes start off with a grapple," Joey began
hesitantly. "Working their way around the ring, each attempting
to gain advantage. Impressive footwork considering those long 
gowns."
     Crystal Dagger looked rather bored with the initial melee
and narrowed her eyes. "Jynx, Body Slam," she commanded. With an
unusual swiftness, Crystal's Jynx slipped behind her doppleganger
and locked in a solid headlock, lifting her feet off the ground.
     "Jynx with a handful of hair..." JR noted in bewilderment.
     "And she spins and whips Ditto face first into a brutal
snapmare!" Tony continued, oblivious to Jim's stunned silence and
Joey's nervous laughter.
     Garrett's Ditto climbed to her hands and knees, as Jynx
loomed above her, bringing her hands to her temples in
preparation for a mental attack. Ditto's hand glowed a faint
blue, sparkles lighting up around it. 
     "Ditto's back up on her feet... and throws a handful of
Powder Snow into Jynx's face!" JR exclaimed. "Some tactics are
universal, it appears...."
     
     "Press the advantage, Ditto, Pound away!" Garrett ordered.
His portly quasi-Jynx hobbled forward to throw an array of
punches into his blind, frost-covered opponent.
     "Ditto's having her way with Dagger's incapacitated Jynx,
and it looks like she's about to finish this! ..." Tony
foretold, as Ditto stepped back to prepare its Ice Punch, waves 
of arctic wind circling its left fist.
     "Ditto charges in for the Ice Punch-- NO!" JR stopped
himself, as Jynx straightened herself upright and swerved to the
side, avoiding Ditto's frosty uppercut. The armored assassin
Crystal Dagger smiled as her Pokemon stepped in to close on her
surprised opponent...
     ... and a pair of open-handed strikes resounded across the
arena, impacting both cheeks of the Ditto's face as it stumbled
to the ground.
     "Jynx counters with a Doubleslap attack!" Tony called out.
     "Umm... yeah..." JR blinked. 
     "And Ditto is none too happy with that! She leaps to her
feet!" Tony continued as the Ditto-Jynx crawled to her feet, 
stomped towards her grinning opponent... and slapped her across 
the face multiple times.
     "And Ditto responds with a Doubleslap of its own!" Tony 
remarked.
     "...this is getting messed up, guys," Joey finally managed. 
     "*Getting?*" JR remarked.

     "I'm through with the games, Edgerton," Dagger sneered.
"We're putting Ditto... on ice." With that, Jynx stretched her
arms wide and, with a fluid motion, thrust them in front of her
towards her opponent, sending forth a cone of arctic winds and
ice.
     "She's playing hardball now! Blizzard's freezing Ditto
over!" JR snapped out of his bewilderment with Jynx's attack. The
shivering Ditto reverted from its Jynx form and solidified into a
quivering, pudding-like state.
     "Ditto is *frozen solid!* and unable to continue!" Tony 
stated. 
     "That prima donna may be too much for our Christian solider, 
fellas," Joey pondered, as both Jynx and her trainer
contemptuously tossed their hair behind their back. Garrett
unsummoned his incapacitated Ditto and withdrew his second
Pokeball. "He's going to have to pull out some major firepower."
     "Don't count Team Revelations out yet," JR reminded. "His
brother's Weedle dominated a massive Snorlax earlier tonight..."

     "I choose you..." Garrett proclaimed dramatically.
"...BULBASAUR!" A small frog-like Pokemon with a tulip bulb on 
its back materialized into view before the sneering Jynx.
     "I have to strongly disagree with this choice, gang," Joey 
noted. "Ice Pokemon can really do a number of Grass types, and
considering what power we've seen from Jynx--"
     
     "Bulbasaur, Razor Leaf!" Before Jynx could act, she was
bombarded with a spiral of bladed leaves, imbedding into her 
limbs and ripping through her fine dress. Crystal Dagger snarled
in frustration, her Jynx trembling from the sudden assault. The 
air crystallized and chilled around the cold Psychic Pokemon 
as she readied another Blizzard in rage...
     "Sleep Powder!" ... before Bulbasaur shook and launched a
cloud of pinkish gas from it's bulb, engulfing Jynx and sending
her to her knees in a dazed stupor. Jynx succumbed to the gas and
collapsed face first into slumber.
     "You were saying, Joey?" Tony asked.
     "Just... never mind," Joey fumed.
     "Crystal Dagger's going to her second Pokemon. It looks like
another humanoid fighter, as Joey mentioned," JR continued, as
the armored woman dismissed the sleeping Jynx and withdrew a
second black Pokeball.
     "Crystal Dagger seems to have an *unusual* variant of
Pokeballs," Tony noticed ominously, as she summoned the
duck-billed fire Pokemon Magmar. He continued in a hushed horror
"... could this mean an unholy alliance with *Ashura!?*"
     "Here's a theory." Joey countered. "She wanted to look all
stealthy and foreboding, and had some black paint around. 'Kay?"

     "Meanwhile, back in the *match*," JR interrupted, fuming at
his two bickering cohorts, "Garrett's looking for a quick win
with more Sleep Powder!" Magmar took a few steps back, bringing
its claws over its bill, before charging forward to the side of
the grass Pokemon, as his head and tail ignited with grey smoke.
     "Bulbasaur's trying to trip it up with Vine Whips, but can't
match speed with that fiery duck!" Tony exclaimed. "*And* he's
letting off a ton of smoke!"
     "This seems to be the set up of choice for Fire-types..."
Joey pondered.
     "Light his fire, Magmar! Ember Barrage!" Crystal Dagger
cried with triumph. A series of small fiery explosions erupted
within the Smokescreen, followed the croaking cries of Bulbasaur.
     
     "Mah GOD! Magmar's laying a world of pain on that little
grass monster," JR uttered sadly. 
     Crystal Dagger smiled darkly into the black cloud. "Dynamic
Punch." The quick suction of air and a boom of sound announced
Magmar's finishing strike which launched the wounded Bulbasaur
out of the cloud and through the air, the little monster landing
in a heap at Garrett's feet. In the slowly fading cloud, the
fire-duck Pokemon turned its back slowly to the Team Revelation
member, clawed fists clenched and turning its billed head to the
side.
     "Mar," Magmar grumbled ominously.

     "Magmar is *en fuego!*" Tony exclaimed.
     "... well, that's a given, Tony," Joey shrugged.
     "Actually, Crystal Dagger *is* dominating this match-up," JR
intervened.
     "She's got another formidable warrior in that flaming duck
*and* Garrett's just got one Pokemon left."
     Garrett emitted a frustrated sigh as he recalled the
battered Bulbasaur, and drew his final Pokeball from his belt. He 
brought the red and white sphere before pointing it forward to 
activate.
     "Fight, Staryu!" The Christian youth called out, as the
starfish-like Pokemon materialized before the glowering Magmar, 
standing up on two of its five legs.

     "Garrett's gained the type advantage, but will it be
enough?" Tony remarked mysteriously.
     "Little Staryu's going airborne." JR began, as the water
Pokemon levitated upward, it's arms spinning rapidly. Magmar
brought one of its clawed hands to its neck. "Magmar's seems to 
have suddenly caught a frog in its throat..."
     "I don't think that's it at-- GYAH!" Joey yelped as
Magmar suddenly spun to face his hovering opponent. The fiery
duck pursed its billed mouth and spit out a spray of noxious
green sludge. "Toxic attack from Magmar... and Crystal better
hope Tajiri isn't watching tonight..."
     "But Garrett was ready for such underhanded tactics!" Tony
explained, as Staryu ducked and wove out of the way of the
poisonous breath. "That *could* have been the match right
there..."
     
     "Staryu! Rapid Spin!" Garrett ordered to his Pokemon. Staryu
obeyed, executing a sharp turn back around towards its humanoid 
opponent.
     "...and Staryu's battering Magmar with a series of midair
slaps! Excellent combination move!" Tony exalted.
     "The duck is *staggering!*" JR exclaimed, as Magmar braced
itself into a martial arts stance, shaking his head. "Looks like
he's setting up for the coup de grace..."

     "Magmar, DYNAMIC PUNCH!" Crystal Dagger commanded. The same
suction of air swirled around Magmar's first as it reared back.
     "This is it, the blow that KOed Bulbasaur may just--" Joey
began...
     "Staryu, THUNDER WAVE!" Garrett shouted, and the crystal on
Staryu's chest lit up, and launched forth an array of blinding
light.

     "...Water-types don't usually do that, do they." Tony asked
as Magmar's Dynamic Punch swung well away from the dodging Staryu
and staggered forward blindly.
     "Staryu can do that, I *don't know why*." Joey countered. 
"I'm not really surprised at this point..."
     "It's spinning upward, Magmar turns around, trying to shake
out the cobwebs..." JR announced as the Staryu looked down and
pointed a pair of arms downward. "...and Magmar eats a pair of
Bubblebeams! He's *down!*"

     "Crystal Dagger's fiery assault has been extinguished." Tony
remarked as the female assassin recalled the drenched Pokemon
with a snarl. "But she still has a fresh Pokemon remaining. What 
Pokemon will she use next?"
     Crystal Dagger gave a dark grin as she popped the third
black Pokeball from the clip on her belt and sent it forward with
a toss. Garrett snarled as his Staryu edged away from his new 
opponent: A portly yellow humanoid Pokemon with black stripes. 
The new Pokemon puffed its chest out and slammed its forearms 
together, resulting in electrical sparks.
     "BUZZzzz!" The yellow Electric Pokemon sneered.

     "Oh dear... Garrett has to face one of the more formidable
electrical Pokemon, Electabuzz!" Tony worried.
     "And-- MAH GAWD! It's looking to end this quick!" JR yelped
as Electabuzz thrust its fist out to send forth a Thunderbolt!
     "Quick! Light Screen!" Garrett quickly called out. The
starfish Pokemon formed a bubble of shimmering air just as the
crackling stream of energy impacted and wrapped around it. The 
thunderous surge subsided, leaving Staryu charred, but still
in-flight.
     "It's a miracle it sucked up that attack." Joey breathed. 
"But Dagger's not giving him any breathing room, Electabuzz with
the Thunder Punch and--" The yellow dynamo lunged in with a
crackling fist... just as Staryu blurred away from its previous 
position. " --it teleported!?"
     "NO! Staryu from behind! With the Swift attack!" JR yelled
as the watery starfish barreled into Electabuzz from the side, 
finishing with a flurry of Rapid Spin-induced slaps.
     "However it looks like *two* can play this game, as Dagger's
sent Electabuzz into Swift mode as well!" Tony remarked, as the
yellow humanoid suddenly blurred and suddenly appeared by Staryu
to strike, until it, too, blurred from view.
     "Both Pokemon are just a *blur* across the ring,
gentlemen..." Joey commented in awe. "Finally, Electabuzz sneaks 
in with a Quick Attack!" 
     Staryu recoiled from the sudden forearm shot, spinning and 
settling onto the ground. Crystal Dagger smiled, satisfied with
her Pokemon's handiwork. The electric dynamo held its fists to 
its sides, focusing the electrical energies around him... and 
letting out a ferocious, shrill scream.
     "GYAH!" Joey cried out, all three commentators reaching to
toss their headsets away. The spectators, too, had a similar
reaction as Electabuzz's Screech resonated across the arena. 
Garrett and his Staryu braced themselves against the sonic 
assault, as the watery Pokemon rose up again and started spinning 
once more...

     "Looks like this is it, gentlemen..." Tony remarked
ominously, regaining the use of his headset. "Both Pokemon are 
readying for their final attack!"
     "Electabuzz charges in!" JR yelled. "He's going for his
trademark Thunder Punch!"
     "Staryu's spinning forward as well and-- WHOA!" Joey gasped
as the spinning Pokemon shot out solid streams of water from each
of its arms. "Whirlpool from Staryu! That's adding speed and a
*lot* of range to its attack, guys!..."
     "The Yellow Dynamo's closing! Weathering the watery blasts
so far..." Tony uttered. Just within striking distance,
Electabuzz ducked just beneath Staryu's spinning arms, a familiar 
suction of wind...
     "Oh, no..." JR gasped, then recoiled as Electabuzz droze a
heinous uppercut into Staryu's back, followed by an electrified
right cross. "Dynamic Punch into a Thunder Punch! A *deadly*
two-hit finish!"
     
     "Spookshow Baby" resounded throughout the auditorium,
heralding the female assassin's victory. The snarling Electabuzz
then turned his attentions toward the horrified Garrett Edgerton. 
     "Guys, I don't think Crystal Dagger's satisfied with just
winning this qualifying round..." Tony warned. "She's drawing her
blade!"
     "Security better intervene quick before they--" JR cried
out. Just then two separate blurs; one white, one blue, impacted 
both Crystal Dagger and Electabuzz. The femme fatale lurched to
one knee and clutched her injured side, glaring down to the light
brown, vaguely canine Pokemon that snarled up at her.
     "It's *always* the damn Eevee...." She snarled.

     "The cavalry's arrived to save Garrett's bacon!" Joey called
out as Garrett's teammates Ryan, Devan, and Jennifer rushed out
to his aid.
     "Team Revelation has arrived in full force!" JR added. "No
way Crystal Dagger can face a fresh band of Poke-" Jim Ross'
remarks were cut off as beams of electricity, fire and ice roared 
in from the shadows between the bleachers. "What in the world!?"
     A larger blur rushed onto the obsidian floor of the arena
before Squirtle and Evee! The two Pokemon cried out and
collapsed, recoiling from the sudden strikes. The grey dust
cleared... and a wiry Dodrio towered over the wounded Pokemon, 
its three heads glowering at the assembled team of Christian
soldiers. Mounted on top of the biped bird Pokemon sat a smirking
Dario, his ribs and sides bound with bandages underneath his
white overcoat. The riding gunman drew his Beretta
and leveled it squarely at Ryan. 
     "Sweet crap! That's Dario Dariani!" Joey gulped, "He's
lending an assist to Dagger against Team Revelations!"
     "What could this *unholy alliance* mean to the PFFL!?" Tony
worried.
     "What's *with* you and the 'unholy alliance' thing?" Joey
snapped at him. 
     "Seriously, though, it was a matter of time before our
competitors started interacting and teaming up, but why these
two?" JR wondered.
     "Mercenaries-in-arms assisting one another?" Tony submitted.
     "Maybe Dario has a thing for form-fitting plate mail." Joey
blinked as he received a pair of perturbed looks from his
cohorts. "Just a thought."
     "On this note we head into the quarterfinals of the Pokemon
Fan Fic League!" JR proclaimed. "For Tony Schiavone and Joey
Styles, good night everyone!"  

---
     The spectators began to mull about, standing up and
gathering their belongings to leave. The camera panned up to the
VIP booths, high above the regular grandstands, hidden behind
darkened windows.
     The camera cut to the inside of one of the booths, where a
single modern, polished desk sat in front of a large series of
monitors. A brooding man edged forward from his plush chair,
adjusting his tinted spectacles as he regarded the recorded
action of tonight's event, playing out on the monitors before
him. Gendo Ikari, chief advisor of the NERV organization,
regarded the activities with a bemused smirk.
     "This... synthesis between the trainer and their animal
companion is most intriguing," Gendo mused aloud. "*Perhaps*
tonight's festivities have shed light on how to implement the
Human Instrumentality Project...."
     The smirk dematerialized into a dark and focused expression. 
Gendo's gaze remained on the monitors... as he lowered a hand
down onto something resting on his desk.
     Something feline, which stretched as Gendo placed his hand
on its back.
     "... is that not correct, Meowth?" he asked
     "Youse got it, Boss!" the cat Pokemon replied in a thick
Bronx accent. Meowth basked evilly as Gendo continued scratching
the back of his neck, both sharing slight, devious laughter. The
feline cat then turned a confidential eye toward the camera and
winked happily.  "This is what we in the villain game call
'tradin' up!'"

     Fade back to the bridge outside of the Sadamoto Memorial 
Auditorium. It is now nighttime, and Rei Ayanami and Slowpoke
watch quietly as the spectators from the PFFL exit in mass into
the night.
     The First Child turned once more to the tired Pokemon, who 
glanced back up at the young girl. In a steady and smooth motion,
Rei knelt down and picked up the Slowpoke. It gave a tired but
happy sigh, as Rei stood back up, gently holding it in her arms. 
     The pale young girl paused, pondering the creature nestled
in her simple hug.
     "This is the Slowpoke... that exists within my mind...."
     Rei Ayanami adjusted her hold so Slowpoke's head rested on
her shoulder, and walked her bike across the bridge towards the
auditorium.

_________________________________________________________________

NEXT TIME on the Pokemon Fan Fic League: 

Quarterfinals: 

Ashura vs Arina Ketchum

Messila Samatha Wetall vs Satoshi

Sailor Pikagirl vs Crystal Dagger

Shigeru Adauchi vs. Ryan Edgerton

Voting Ballot coming soon to a website near you!
_________________________________________________________________


Author's Notes:  

Tim: Well, The opening matches are out of the way now... and
     we've concluded one of our more surreal PTB Productions. 
     This one may very well spawn a Tokyo-3 PFFL based interlude. 
     Anyway, we hope this latest installment was worth the wait. 
     See ya next time!

Alicia: Slow, but since when have we not been slow lately? 
     Voting ballot for the quarterfinals will be up soon, so
     don't forget to cast your votes for the outcome of the
     Quarterfinals! Now is when the action will really start to 
     heat up! 

_________________________________________________________________ 

All characters appearing within this story are *not* the property
of PTB Productions.  PTB Productions lays no claim to any
licenses or trademarks in the making of this fic, and means no
offense to anyone.  This story is written in the spirit of
good-natured comedy, and it is our sincere hope that you will
read the original works these characters came from.  You might
just be surprised!  

The PFFL itself, however, is the creation of PTB Productions, all
rights reserved.  
_________________________________________________________________