Mystic Mice—Episode 00

(Note: this series is a work of fiction, and is considered legally as Parody. 'Fair Use' rules and “Similarities are purely coincidental” clauses are hereby called. Any attempts of legal action for infringement are completely unwarranted. You don’t know how Davey-kins FoxFire can get.)

Disney Lawyers thwarted by "Modern Day Mickey and Minnie"

Johnny Briz and Sue Traveller, two mice you may be seeing in the future, giving Michael Eisner headaches.

Dateline: Las Vegas

A pair of Weasel lawyers from The Walt Disney Company went to Las Vegas to investigate a case of copyright infringement on what appeared to be a local costumed character. However, they got more than they expected when they gave free press to what some would consider to be an unofficial mascot to the Underground Disney Magic which got an upsurge thanks to Roy E Disney's departure from the Company's Board of Directors.

And the biggest surprise is that, unlike the weasels this character isn't even a cartoon character at all.

His name is Johnny Briz, an actual living breathing field mouse who stands at 2 foot 5 from his hind legs, and despite having a humanoid build a falsetto voice and a perchance for white gloves and pants with buttons on them, he doesn't look a bit like anything from Disney. He sports grayish body fur soft to the touch with three spots on his body, off color ears (His right ear is black while the left one is gray), green eyes which are rare for a mouse, and a long mullet of brown hair that goes down his back almost to a black tail. Johnny’s usual outfit—instead of the infamous red pants—is a vested jumpsuit with red-striped collars and cuffs and a pair of familiarly-placed buttons, black striped shoes, and white gloves.

"I'm a gentle soul and eager to please, I'll be your friend if you give me some cheese." Johnny Briz charms another Disney Convention visitor out of his lunch.  There is no doubt that he will not be going hungry anytime soon.

Johnny was being introduced to the world by none other than Roy Disney himself during a local convention he raised in support to the downsized animators and crew members that once worked for the company Roy’s famous uncle founded.

“I have found this little fella scurrying around this town after following some of the gossip in Vegas,” Roy admitted before a skit to be played in a mock abandoned animation studio. “What surprised me is that not only is he the right height to what Walt saw Mickey Mouse as, but the two are uncannily similar in nature. This guy’s just as scrappy, talented, and friendly as the 75-year-old icon but with a Generation Y twist, and I think you’ll enjoy his company as much as I have.”

During this skit, where some former Disneyland Cast Members visit the staged run-down studio, one of the actors stuffed Mickey’s ‘Goodwill Ambassador’ tuxedo into an old ink bottle. In a flash of blue stardust, the bottle vanished, and Johnny appeared magically in it’s place wearing that same costume to join into the routine. If the crowd wasn’t wowed by the mouse’s appearance, they were exceedingly so when Johnny proved his realness when he leaped into the audience in a stage dive, something no hologram, animated film, or Audio-Animatronic can ever do.

Johnny's grand entry into the Con by an improntu skit, just before winning the hearts of the public by trouncing two convention-crashing weasels from The Walt Disney's Company's Legal Team.

They were wowed all the more as Johnny’s scrappiness came into play when the two weasels from TWDC’s legal department stormed the stage. Johnny merely told the crew to “keep going” as he proceeded to make the two unwitting weasels part of the act.

A series of acrobatic dodges, cartoon-like kicks to the pants and/or head, numerous taunts and razzes, and an impromptu illusion and escape of two turned the routine into JB’s first improvisational ‘animated short,’ as it was being filmed both professionally and by audience camcorders at the time. The fact that two of the most feared legal force in existence were reduced to utter jokes was an added plus to the crowd, as the roaring approval at the end of the skit attested. He was about to be lifted onto the shoulders of the people to whom Johnny apparently supplanted the 75-year-old animated icon in the hearts of a corporate disenfranchised and disgruntled group.

But not before a white blond girl mouse in a Minnie Mouse style dress scurried under the crowd to tackle Johnny into a worried embrace, crying over the attack he got from the weasels. The girl mouse’s name is Susan Traveller, and to everyone’s surprise she’s Johnny Briz’s girlfriend; this next gen Mickey even has his own Minnie!!

"Waaauugh!  I was so worried, Johnnie!"  "Hey!  Take it easy Sue!!" The two rodent lovebirds sharing the limelight together for the first time in hopefully many.

Afterward, Johnny Briz and Susan were joined with Roy E. Disney and Adam Packbell, a local 20-something that found Johnny and Susan near his home, formed a more public press release as the film of that skit was being copied, shared, distributed, and on it’s way to file sharing servers all over the world. While Johnny switched back to his usual outfit and was eagerly greeting the crowd, mugging the cameras, and in general being his charmy self, Susan was still in her cosplay outfit and shyly stood by the two humans.

“My God! Just his first day, and already he’s got Mouseketeers!  Am I seeing things or are people putting Mullets to Mouse Ears?  And it's only been two hours, CHEEZE!!” Adam quipped as he chided his small friend against asking for his own park at this time. “Personally, I can’t see why he doesn’t get a draw that he’s getting. Ever since Uncle Roy here [Roy tried to protest to being referred to with the endearing suffix of ‘Uncle,’ but he relented] left the way he left, there’s been a gathering crowd of people who wanted a Walt Disney Company in it’s former glory. If not back when Walt was still alive, at least to the renaissance of the 1980s and early 90s. And if they can’t get the company they’re such fans of to return to the love of it’s youth, they’ll be sure to make it themselves in their own image, as the reception Johnny and Sue here can show.”

"ROY!  I thought you said that Michael's Marketing Monkeys won't be around here!" Adam Packbell, Johnny Briz's human friend, shows him and Roy E. Disney something he found being made by some conventioneer:  Mickey Mouse Ears half-painted gray with a brown wig attached.  Both Toon-like Mouse and Former Disney Exec--and Walt Disney's nephew--disavow all knowledge of 'Johnny Ears'

Roy was about to opine about events like the rodent’s appearance did not occur in a vacuum, but “is one of several examples of the reality that, although lawyers and accountants may own the copyrights and the intellectual property apparently until the end of time, the Magic that Walt Disney discovered and shared to the public is and always will be Public Domain.”  Not before saying that he is not responsible for 'Johnny Ears,' that is.

However, Roy had to wait to get past the 'Johnny Ears' part, because at the time he was about to get to what he wanted to say, Adam had to knock Roy Disney down to keep him from being splattered by what will be discovered to be chemical stun gel paint balls fired by the two weasels wielding paint guns, as a third charged the stand to snatch Susan in bear-like arms, saying that “We at Disney have enough of these two!!”

Johnny Briz wasted no time in drawing their fire, leaping and bounding over anything and everything around the entire block dodging over 250 rounds of spiked paint balls without even getting as much as a splash on his clothes!! The same wasn’t said for parts of the crowd, however, as some bystanders had to be hospitalized by the flying substance.

NOW, do you believe he's not a cartoon character? Some quick thinking by a photographer shows a triple shot of Johnny Briz dodging some of the over 250 rounds of less-lethal hardware fired at him, performing acrobatic stunts more realistic than anything made by current amusement park technology, or even Pixar, for that matter.

To everyone’s surprise, it was Susan who started the counterattack, by squirming away from the badger’s bear hold after whipping out a huge toon-like mallet from out of nowhere, and in one swing knocked the weasel out cold enough to gather frost in his body. She then lunged at the other two and joined Johnny Briz in rendering all three weasel lawyers unconscious before the Las Vegas Police took them away on public disturbance charges. Other charges, such as multiple assault charges and harassment of Adam and Roy, came within two and a half hours.

Counter Attack by JB and Sue!! To this day, nobody knows where Susan Traveller, JB's 'Minnie' hid that mallet (Right), but those weasels were sure sorry she did, if they weren't eating Johnny's boot. (Below)

Afterward, after Roy said what he wanted to state earlier, about Disney Magic being Public Domain and inviting anyone to make their own, he thanked Johnny and Adam on their way to their home, which was requested not to be listed, and offered to help them out as much as he can.

Michael Eisner gave no comment as he accompanied the bailing out of the three toon lawyers, outside of the fact that Johnny has in fact fallen under Fair Use laws, but went short of apologizing to the two mice and Adam for the actions of the weasels: "The Walt Disney Company just doesn’t go after every 13-year-old kid who makes their own Disney-like character. Who do you think we are, the RIAA? I doubt that I'd—err, we’d have any more customers buying my—err, our 3-D movies, going to our parks, and so on, if I—err, we tried to improve our financial circumstances through litigation."

However, other board members of the company, anonymously commented that they will consider further action, if any, to be taken against ‘those two mulleted Mickey and Minnie wanna bes’ and ‘that lame punk brat in flyover country’, derogatorily referring to Johnny, Susan, and Adam.

None of the three gave any comment when Adam was reached the following morning, earlier this day, on their way to grab some snacks near his home, as Johnny Briz and Susan wait--at times on the roof like in this picture--for what their popularity among the underground of Disney Fandom bring to them.

----Jenny McArthy, [Lifestyle reporter of the] Las Vegas Stripline [Newspaper]

Mystic Mice #00 (of an ongoing text and picture series) ©2004 David Gonterman, all rights reserved. Johnny Briz ©2004 David Gonterman. Susan Traveller ©2004 Drew Rhine. You can visit FoxFire Studios of Saint Louis at http://foxfire.twu.net .