Riochet Regular and Chicken Master (8/24/00 7:21:18 am) Reply Domsday Riochet Racing (FANFICTION, dammit!) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Okay...this Fanfic is the first part of a huge 10 part Fanfic Saga! Sweet, huh? Also, somewhere in the fifth or sixth part you get to meet/re meet....ah, heck with it. You'll see. ^__^ ---------------------- Doomsday Riochet Racing ----------------------- (SCENE:TIG [The Idiot Gang]s' base. Tonic is pasing back and forth, trying to think of a plan. Frankly, he didn't have any. The others had ideas, but they all involved either Andre in a ballarina costume, or dropping pie on Andre in a ballarina costume, or both.) Tonic: Dammit, I can't think! Jolt: Never could, boss. Tonic: Shut up! Jolt: Right boss. Hougan: HHHHHHHHHooooooooowwwwwwww 'bbbboouuuuuutttttt wwwwweeeeee........... Tonic: For the last time, none of my plans are going to include you or Andre in ballarina costumes! Hougan: WWWWWWWhhhhhhhooooooo ssssssaaaaaaiiiiiiddddd aaaannnnnnnyyyyyyytttthhhhii- iiiiiiinnnnngggggg aaaaaabbbbbbooooouuuutttttt ccccoooosssstttttuuummmmmeeeeesssss? Tonic: Oh my God, you're even sicker than me , and I have sex with myself. Oral sex with myself. Jolt: Y'know, boss, wanting to be a male ballarina is alot less sicker than having oral sex with yourself. Tonic: Shut up! Jolt: Yes, boss. May I get you some condoms for yourself? Tonic: Hmmm, how about later. I just got the greatest idea.....heh heh heh HEH! Andre: IIIIIIIIssssssssssss iiiiiittttttt mmmmmmyyyyyyy iiidddddeeeeeaaaaaa?! Tonic: No. The plan is... (Due to Plot hole interference, we can't hear his plan. The interference stops just as he gets done.) Tonic: Oh yes...aaaaaahhhhhhh......mmmmmmmmm.....Oh, yeah, back to the plan. The plan is... (Just as he starts yapping, a blast hits him.) Tonic: Aaaaaaah! (We see Ami in front of the rest of TPCG with smoke flying out of her canon.) Ami: Guess you weren't expecting us! Tonic: Get them scouts! TIG: Hey ho hey ho hey ho! TPCG: Let's go let's go let's go! (Some old 70s BatMan fighting music plays. Jolt whips out two sticks and makes a fire. Tonic slaps his ass to taunt TPCG. Sonique kicks Jolt, and the caption "SNIFF!" flies on the screen. Riochet does absolutely nothing and AndyMan falls. "ZAPPBRANIGAN!" appears on the screen. Andre runs away, but Anony teleports in front of him and punches him. "TELE-WHACK!" appears on screen. Fighting stops, but Tonic keeps slapping his ass. Some Power-Ranger style getting hit and flying back is displayed by TPCG.) Tonic: Off my property! Riochet: No way, old man! Tonic: Huh? (Riochet turns into hedgehog and spindashes him.) Tonic: OWW! Wait! I want to get to the part where I explain my plan! Shorty: Don't you do that later? Tonic: I wanna now! (We see Ami run down a flieght of stairs.) Ami: No time! There's a bomb! TIG and TPCG: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! (All run off. They stand outside TIGHQ.) Ami: Right...NOW! (Absolutely nothing happens. Okay, and door falls off due to Hougans bad hammer and nails, but that's it.) TPCG-Craaaaaaaaap. (TPCG start to walk away, but Riochet stays. He then throws a chair at thier base.) Riochet: Take that, you piece of junk! (Riochet runs off. The next day, Tonic is marvelling over a small device. AndyMan walks in.) AndyMan: What izzit, boss? Tonic: This chip will let me achieve my ultimate form, Turbo Tonic! AndyMan: Wow, that's catchy! Tonic: Yep, and it doubles as a fibrator! (Tonic becomes Turbo Tonic.) Turbo Tonic: Wahahahahahahahahaha! Now, I will challebge one of TPCG to a race! If I win, they have to give us the exact loacation of thier base! AndyMan: Yeah! (TPCG are lying around a...place. Turbo Tonic rushes in.) Shorty: What the hell? Tonic has a make over? Turbo Tonic: It's my ultimate form, Turbo Tonic! Now, I challenge...hmmmm....Riochet to a race! If I win, you give me the exact location of your base! Sonique: If we win? Turbo Tonic: Then, you keep your base. Riochet: 'Nuff talk, more race! (Riochet becomes Redwing Riochet.) Turbo Tonic: Oh, I forgot, you can only be your original ultimate form. Redwing Riochet: Aww crap. (Redwing Riochet turns back to Doomsday Riochet.) Doomsday Riochet: Either way, I'll beat you! Turbo Tonic: We'll see about that. (Later, Turbo an Doomsday are at the starting line. Then the race starts with Doomsday in head, then Turbo. It keeps doing this, until the end, where Doomsday wins. Turbo, who is outraged, challenges Doomsday to a fight.) Doomsday: Fight? I'm even better at fighting than racing! You don't stand a chance! (Turbo loses horribly.) Turbo: Ow! I hurt! (Turbo runs off scared. Doomsday becomes Riochet again.) Riochet: Ber ber! (For no reason at all, scene changes to Seth on the can.) Seth: Downloading! I'm downloading! La la la! DOWNLOADING!!!!! (Scene switches back to TIGHQ.) Tonic: Okay, so that plan sucked like me when I'm bored. But I have a plan that'll never fail! Soniprow: Maybe so, boss, but I wanna make a plan! Tonic: Hmmm, I have the ultimate plan to destroy TPCG for good and you want me to drop it just for your risky idea?! Soniprow: Um....yes? Tonic: Right, so start thinking. THE END.......OR IS IT??!!! (DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN!) Shut up! --------- ~~~Riochet- Regular, red hedgehog that can be a a black, brown, and tan dog, Chicken Master, and Minister of War all in one.~~~