Yeah, yeah, MST3K theme, fill it in as you go... Starring........ SHORTY!: Smeg and smeg again! Sidekick Rollcall: Lil' HEDGIE!: Where's Chaochi? TLoB!: Pointless. It's all pointless. Matt the YAK!: Is it soup yet? Back to the theme song... And other pointless facts (lalala) Just repeat to yourself "Vegemite is brown" And then you can relax! For... Mystery Sonic Theater 3000!!!! *Matt walks in* Matt: Hey, where am I? This isn't the West End Caf! Shorty: You're here to MiST, remember? Lil: Yay, and I'm back too! YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA... *all others block ears till Lil stops* Shorty: Are you done Lil? Lil: Think so. Shorty: Right, then let's get on with it! Roll it, TLoB! TLoB: West End Caf?? *rolls it* > Amy Adventure > by Ashley > ***********@aol.com TLoB: Great name. Soooooooo original. > Chapter One Matt: ... there's chapters to this thing? > It was a sunny day at Emerald Coast. Shorty: Until lightning struck Sonic, killing him instantly. Lil: THE END. Can we go now? > "Sonic, where are you going now?" TLoB: Out of this fic! > Sonic the Hedgehog looked over his shoulder >at Amy Rose, the young hedgehog who was racing hot on his heels. > "Egg Carrier 3," he called back. Shorty: Egg Carrier... Lil: ...3? All: Rrrrriiiight. > "Why there?" > Sonic slowed down a little. > "Isn't that Dr. Eggman’s new warship that flies around Mobius?" Amy asked. Matt: Yeah, but it's flying out of this fic, so that's OK. Shorty: Take me with you! Lil: THE END. Can we go NOW? > "The one that’s powered by the 7 Chaos Emeralds? I heard that fortress is powerful and that >even you couldn’t destroy it!" TLoB: Oooh, spooky. I'm reeeeeeeeaaaall scaaaaaaared. > Sonic answered sarcastically. Matt: Wait, who's this 'Sarcastically' person? TLoB: I think it meant Amy, his 'sarcastic ally'. Shorty: *sigh* Lil, you know what 'sarcastically' is, yes? Lil: Yeah, it's a city in Greece. Shorty: I give up on all of you. > "No, I’d just get blasted by the cannons and fall to >my watery grave... OF COURSE I CAN DESTROY IT!" Lil: Good thing you told us that. Matt: Would never have guessed. > "I was only kidding..." Amy sighed. TLoB: Good thing you told us that. Shorty: Would never have guessed. > Sonic didn't reply. He just smiled, eyes gleaming. Then he grabbed Amy and >carried her away. > When they arrived at Station Square, the Egg Carrier 3 was there as expected, > hovering above the city. Amy looked up in amazement. Then suddenly, something whooshed >over them. Matt: It was... a SONIC_FAN RAY! Shorty: ammy lets hav cybursekx Lil: FOCK U! > "SONIKKU!" > Amy shrieked as she was snatched up, and she and her captor vanished in a gray >streak of light! Matt: Shorty, it's streaking! Call the ground security! > "What the -- AMY!" > It didn't take long for Sonic to realize what had happened. "This has to be one of >Dr. Eggman’s tricks!" > Indeed it was! Shorty: Indeed. > When Dr. Eggman saw Sonic approaching, he had dispatched his >robot, Hyper Zero, to grab Amy and lure his archenemy into danger. TLoB: Hyper Zero now? Lil: What's next, Ultra Eggman? Matt: Doesn't matter. Even Hyper, that robot's a big nothing. *All turn to stare at Matt* TLoB: That's possibly the worst joke I've ever heard. > "How convenient!" Eggman said. "This time my scientific expertise will crush >you! Once the Master Emerald is in my hands, I'll be able to conquer the world! MWHA, HA >HA, HA, HA!" Lil: That laugh's gotta be evil. It has commas. > The Egg Carrier 3 zoomed off over the ocean. >Sonic ran and stopped right at the point where land and water meet. He hated water! >Frustrated, he stood on a rock and thought. Shorty: He stood on a thought? That's good footing! Matt: And YOU gave up on US... > Eggman had control of the seven Chaos Emeralds. He had Amy, and soon he would have the Master >Emerald... but not if he got to it first! Matt: Well, surprise surprise! TLoB: Hmm.. Get Emeralds Before Eggman. Original. Lil: Hey, that's cool! TLoB: What is? Lil: Speaking with all those capitals like that! Hey, look, I Can Do It Too! > His adventure off and aboard the Egg Carrier 3 was going to be more exciting and >dangerous than he'd planned. It was time to get a move on! Shorty: Actually, it was around two o'clock. But what the hell. > Chapter Two > "Let me go you piece o’junk! I mean it!" Amy whined Shorty: And she meant it. > as Hyper Zero carried her down the corridor that led to the main control room. Eggman was >awaiting them. "Good work, Zero! Alert the other robots to prepare to attack Angel Island. >((If you read the comics, Angel Island is the same place as The Floating Island. It just has >a different name for the game.)) Matt: (Sarcastically) Wow, it's _educational_ too. TLoB: Oh, so YOU'RE the Sarcastic Ally! Lil: YAYAYA! Now You're Using Capitals Too! TLoB: Well, I Suppose I Am. Shorty: *sigh* > Leave the girl here." TLoB: The Sarcastic Ally Will Do The Rest. Matt: Must... not... kill... TLoB... > Hyper Zero saluted Eggman, then walked back out. > "Now it’s my chance." Amy ran for the door. > "Not so fast, hyper hedgie." All: Hyper Hedgie? That's his insult?? Matt: She might be related to you, Lil Hedgie. Lil: Don't push it... > Eggman pressed a nearby button and the door shut instantly. Matt: Well, _he_ pushed it. Shorty: Nah, that was more of a press. > Amy turned her head around slowly and whimpered. She was trapped in a room with her >hero’s archenemy. Eggman’s shadow loomed over the frightened hedgehog. She started to cry. >Quietly, she whispered. "Sonikku, where are you..." TLoB: I'm wondering who pushed it, if Robotnik didn't. > Meanwhile, Sonic was riding on the train to get to the Mystic Ruins. He soon >arrived there. Lil: Is this soon as in "Christmas is coming"? Or the other kind? Shorty: It's both, Lil. It's both. > As soon as the train stopped and the doors opened, he speeded out toward Miles "Tails" >Prower’s house. Knock, knock, knock! No answer. Matt: Whee!! Knock, knock, knock! Lil: No, It's Knock, Knock, Knock! TLoB: I'm bored with knocking. > "Tails? Are you there? Yo, Tails!" Still no answer. "I guess I’ll have to head for >Angel Island." Sonic decided, so he ran off toward the nearby cave. Matt: As you do. > There was Tails! He could see him with Knuckles the Echidna in the distance. > They looked like they were discussing something. Shorty: Hmm. So you cook it in a white wine sauce you say? TLoB: Yes, and some parsley to garnish. Matt: Sonic reminds Amy of parsley. Lil: And rice is small! *silence* Lil: Well it is. > "Hey Knux! I came to warn..." Just then, a huge flying aircraft appeared out of >nowhere from the big puffy white clouds above them. Shorty: Heck y'all some of them is puffy and some of them are white, heck y'all some of 'em aren't; even clouds at all y'all! > "Its Eggman! I know it!" Tails shouted, pointing up to the Egg Carrier 3. > "He’s gonna pay for stealing the Chaos Emeralds." Knuckles said. Lil: Cash or credit card? > "I’ve got to protect the Master Emerald at all costs!" > "HA, HA, HA! That emerald belongs to me now!" boomed a loud voice. Matt: With more commas in it. > Sonic looked up and saw Dr. Eggman standing on top of the Egg Carrier. Amy > was standing beside him with her hands and feet tied together and a gag in her mouth. > Tears were streaked down her face. Shorty: It's that streaker again. *calls Security. They escort the streaker off the pitch, hats strategically placed over, erm, interesting bits* Matt: HENTAI! > "Hmmm, here is the lovely, cute, and cheerful Amy Rose. But she doesn’t look so >cheerful, does she? Surely, she wants her hero to save her. I could just push her off." >Eggman tapped Amy, making her fall over on her knees. > Sonic waved an angry fist. "Damn you, Eggman!" Amy fell through a trap door. TLoB: FOCK U!! I wil Gt u for thIS robtnik! > "If you want to see Amy again," Eggman started. "You’ll have to give me the >Master Emerald." > "Never!" Knuckles boomed back. > "Not a chance!" Tails added. TLoB: Two and two is four; four and four is *Shorty treads on his foot* Shorty: Not that kind of adding. > Sonic said nothing. Lil: Nothing! > "Is our hedgehog hero thinking?" Eggman grinned evilly. He jumped back into the >warship. Slowly, the Egg Carrier 3 started to fly off. Sonic turned to Tails and Knuckles >quickly. > "Listen up guys, you two stay here and protect the Master Emerald. I’ve gotta’ go >get the Chaos Emeralds back..and rescue Amy." > "Right!" Knux replied. > "Anything to help!" Tails said. Matt: Anything? Lil: Alright, Tails. Paint yourself green and pretend you're a packet of croutons. > "All right. Eggman, here I come!" And with that, Sonic sped off in the Egg >Carrier’s direction. > "Good luck, Sonic!" Tails called out. But Sonic couldn’t hear him. He was... Shorty: ...deafened by going to too many heavy metal concerts... > focused on catching up with the Egg Carrier 3. Shorty: Oh. TLoB: Well, you were close... > Chapter Three > Amy sat quietly in a corner of a jail cell. She looked out the barred window sadly. > Then suddenly, she saw a blue streak of light. > "Sonikku?" She blinked. "Sonikku!" She got up to cheer- but fell back over from >the chains around her legs. "If only I had my mallet..but nooooo, I had to leave it at > home." Matt: MalletCard. Never leave home without it. > Hyper Zero entered the room. It bowed to Amy. > "Miss Rose, Dr. Eggman wishes to see you." > Amy sighed. "What does his royal ‘egg’ness want now?" Then she started to sing. >"1-800-94 Jenny!" Zero pointed his lazer riffle at the hedgehog. > "Not very funny." The cell door opened, and Zero walked in and grabbed Amy by >her arm. All: Uh-huh. Lil: Well that bit was dumb. > Meanwhile, outside, Sonic had finally caught up with the Egg Carrier 3 and was >hanging on for dear life onto one of the wings. He thought about what he was saying to Amy, >before she got kidnapped, as he looked down at the water. Shorty: *awooga* *awooga* TENTATIVE ROMANCE ALERT! > "Oh boy, if I slip I’m a goner. Where’s the Tornado when ya need it. I guess I’m gonna have to >face this one alone." Sonic soon spotted a nearby door. Lil: There's that "soon" again. TLoB: Yeah, can we have a time please? > He climbed up the wing and made his way toward the door. Luckily, it wasn’t locked. He took >hold of the door handle, pulled and tugged at it, and the door flung open. He scampered in >and slammed the door shut. Matt: Because, we all know that when you build a mighty warship you have to leave at least one convenient entrance. Shorty: Well, unless you're Sonic_Fan. Then you can just write "Sonics ecsaPd anb beted Robtnik:". > "Phew, got out of that one." He looked down the hallway. > It was split in three directions. "Now let’s see, what should I do first? I could go search >for the Chaos Emeralds. Or I can go find Amy." Shorty: Yes, it's Sonic The Game Show! Our next contestant is Sonic! Sonic, Choose A Door! Lil: Hey, now he's doing that capit.. Matt: Sshh! *yells out* Pick Door Number One! Lil: No, Number Two! Shorty: Ten seconds thinking time, Sonic. TLoB: TAKE THE SAUCEPANS!!!!!! > Sonic paused for a second. "I remember Amy saying that this whole ship was >powered by the 7 Chaos Emeralds. So...they should be somewhere in the engine room." >Just then, Hyper Zero headed down the same hallway Sonic was in. Matt: Well, surprise surprise. TLoB: And just when he'd figured out where to go next. What a remarkable coincedence. Shorty: Umm, guys? How do you know what "coincedence" means and not "sarcastically"? TLoB: The Sarcastic Ally? Where????? Lil: More Capitals!!! YAYAYAYAYAY!!!! Shorty: *sigh* > Amy Rose’s eyes lit up. Shorty: Sonic had set her on fire. > "Sonikku, you came to save me!" > "Yeah, yeah, save all the mushy stuff." Sonic pointed to Zero. "Ya better let go of >Amy now, ya walkin’ can opener!" Matt: That's the second-largest can opener I've ever seen. > Zero threw Amy to the opposite side of the hall. "Get ready to be exterminated >hedgehog." The robot reached over with one of its powerful claws and grabbed Sonic by >his neck. > "Grrrahhh, Amy get out of here now!" > "But what about you?" TLoB: I'll find that Eggman and put him outta commission! Matt: No! It's Sonic Adventure Quotes Syndrome! Run, all of you! > "I’ll take care of this badnik." Sonic said between breaths. "Now go!" >Amy rushed down the hallway toward the engine room. "There’s gotta’ be some >way I can save Sonikku." She thought to herself. "And I’m going to find it!" Lil: But first, find Waldo! > Chapter Four > Meanwhile, back on Angel Island, Tails and Knuckles were sitting out on the >steps in front of the Master Emerald. > "Knuckles, do you think Sonic is okay?" Tails asked. > "Hmm, hard to tell right now." Shorty: Well, our next contestant on Sonic the Game Show is Knuckles Echidna. Special subject, the completely obvious. > "I bet any minute we’re going to see the Egg Carrier 3 flying back this way, >exploding, and we’re going to see Sonic jumping down from the warship." > "With the Chaos Emeralds." Knuckles added. > "Yeah, and with Amy." Lil: Another pointless scene. TLoB: Hey! I thought pointlessness was MY job! > "Dr. Eggman, Sonic the Hedgehog has penetrated the ship." Hyper Zero announced. >On a nearby monitor, there was a picture of Zero on the screen. The robot was choking Sonic! Matt: Uh, we figured that out already. Thankyou _so_ much. > "I order you to destroy him!" Dr. Eggman yelled back toward the monitor. > "And what about the escaped female hedgehog, Amy Rose?" > "Just take care of that blue freak!" > "It shall be done, my lord." The monitor clicked off. > Amy was in the engine room. She looked in awe Shorty: Awwwww... > as she spotted the 7 Chaos Emeralds, each in their separate energy tubes. "I need to take >these emeralds to Sonikku, but if they are removed from the energy tubes, the Egg Carrier 3 >may fall and crash." She walked over to one of the emerald tubes and carefully opened the >glass door. "Only one way to find out." > "Well, well, well. It’s Sonic crazy Amy!" Amy turned around in shock. Shorty: Why's she in shock? That was as predictable as ever! > "Baka Eggman!" Matt: Oooh, Japanese. I understood that. All: Well whoopee-doo. > "Ha, you’re the fool. As you take away each emerald, this warship will start to >lose altitude and plummet to the ground. And I know you wouldn’t want to do that, would you?" > "Arrrgg! Uhmph!!" Sonic landed on the floor in front of the engine room’s door. > Amy looked to the beat up and bruised Sonic. > "Sonikku, no!" She ran to the door and looked out to the hallway. Hyper Zero was >dismantled, its parts lay scattered all over. TLoB: *yawn* > "Time for me to go!" Dr. Eggman slipped into a hidden doorway and disappeared. All: Uhmn? > "Ah, Amy...." Sonic said weakly. > She smiled, eyes watery, as she struggled to pick him up. "We’re gonna get out of >here now." Shorty: *awooga* *awooga* TENTATIVE ROMANCE ALERT! Matt: Dude, shut that thing OFF! > Sonic managed to stand up, but needed help walking. "Sonic, the 7 Chaos >Emeralds are here. I think you know what to do." TLoB: Yes! I must... SAMBA! Lil: De Amigo? Matt: Lil, that was as predictable as the last few scenes. > Amy carefully placed Sonic leaning against a wall. She quickly ran to each energy tube, >opened it, and grabbed the emerald inside it. Then she ran back to Sonic, placing the >emeralds in his hands. Both of them could feel the Egg Carrier 3 start to dart toward the >ground. > Sonic closed his eyes, concentrating. His blue fur started to change into a golden >color. His quills and spikes stood up on his head. When he opened his eyes, they were >red. Lil: It was a _really_ bad photo... > Amy was blinded by a flash of white light as she too, was undergoing some changes. > Her clothes disappeared, Matt: HENTAI! Shorty: Matt, I'm warning you... > her fur turned transparent blue (ya know, like in the Sailor Moon transformation sequences), >and her eyes turned pink. > Sonic took her hand. "Let’s go!" > Chapter Five > "Knuckles, look!" Tails shouted, pointing up at a falling figure in the sky. "The >Egg Carrier 3 is crashing into the ocean!" TLoB: Watch out! You're gonna crash! Aaah! Lil: Sonic's line. > A few seconds later, Knuckles and Tails could see a gold and blue streak zooming out from >the warship. > "Whoa, get a load of that." said Knuckles, sliding on his sunglasses and squinting. All: SUNGLASSES? > "Looks like Super Sonic and...Super Amy?" > Tails blinked. "Super Amy!?" Lil: Or "Sailor Chibi Rose", more likely. Shorty: What? From that Super Special? This is her? > The two blurs headed toward Angel Island as the Egg Carrier 3 crashed. Both of >them landed in front of the wide eyed, opened mouthed two-tailed fox and echidna. Matt: Wide-eyed open-mouthed two-tailed fox. That's a hell of a name for a species. TLoB: Fool! It's 'opened mouthed'! > "We’re back!" Super Amy said as she held up a peace sign. Lil: Make Love Not War! Matt: HEN... *catches Shorty's eye* ...nevermind. > Sonic grinned. > "Where are the Chaos Emeralds?" Knuckles asked, snapping out of the ‘spell’. > Super Sonic and Super Amy closed their eyes. The 7 Chaos Emeralds appeared in >front of them in a flash of light. The two hedgehogs powered down. > "That was a cool experience." Amy said. "But I prefer to be called Hyper Amy >when in that form." TLoB: Yeah, like it would happen again. > "Yeah, like it would happen again." Sonic said seriously. TLoB: Call me psychic! > "I only let you use them because I knew that there would be no way that you would be able >to keep up with me when we escaped from that ship." > Amy pouted. Shorty: Naughty! Remember, 'You better not pout!' Lil: Santa won't come to HER now! > "I was only kidding..." > "Uh, Sonikku..?" > "Yeah Amy?" > She looked down at the grass, shuffling her feet. Then she spoke quickly. "Would >you go out with me, pleeease?" Shorty: *AWOOGA* *AWOOGA* TENTATIVE ROMANCE: RED ALERT! *AWOOGA* *The others stuff corks in their ears* > Sonic got an Anime sweatdrop. Matt: He 'got' an anime sweatdrop? Lil: Yeah. For Christmas. See, he didn't pout. Shorty: Whereas Amy got a lump of coal. TLoB: Really? How boring! > Then yawned, looking to Tails and then glancing over to Knuckles who was putting the >Chaos Emeralds back in place in the shrine around the Master Emerald. >"I’ll sleep on that question." Shorty: Not only can he stand on a thought, he can sleep on a question! What balance! > The bright sun started to set in the distance, reflecting off the four Freedom Fighters. > "All of you’d best be goin’ now." Knuckles said. "It’ll be dusk soon." > Tails nodded. "He’s right!" > The three friends waved back at their echidna friend, as they walked away from >Angel Island. > "Thank you for saving Angel Island and getting back the emeralds for me!" Sonic >could hear Knuckles shouting in the distance. TLoB: *awooga* *awooga* OUT OF CHARACTER ALERT! Shorty: Hey, don't steal my siren! > At Tails’ house, in the Mystic Ruins, Sonic and Amy said their good-byes and >headed toward the train station. Sonic was going to escort Amy home to make sure >she was okay and then head back to the Mystic Ruins. Matt: Uh, oh, an "argument scene" coming up. Surely a sign of Tentative Rom.. TLoB & Lil: DON'T SAY IT! Shorty *AWOOOOOOGA!!!* *AWOOOOGA!!!* *siren explodes* > "Thank you for saving me, Sonikku." Amy said. > "Yeah well, you’d better be more careful next time." > "I didn’t know we would meet up with Eggman." > "You saw the ship though, and you knew who was operating it ‘cause you told me >about it!" > "How could I have dodged Hyper Zero? It was flying right toward me!" > "You could’ve hit it with your hammer or hid behind me!" > "But I didn’t see it!" > Sonic walked into the train. "Let’s just go." > Amy felt that her feelings were hurt. Lil: Amy _felt_... Matt: ...that her _feelings_ were hurt. *all look at each other* >She slowly followed Sonic into the train. The train was empty. > "C’mon over here, Amy." said Sonic. He patted the seat next to him. She sat down >reluctantly, looking at the floor. Sonic turned to Amy, put his hand under her chin, >and lifted her face. "Sorry I yelled at ya." TLoB: Good thing that siren's broken. > "It’s okay." Amy said in a small voice. "I’m used to it by now and..." The train > had stopped at Station Square. "I’ll see you later, Sonikku." And with that, she ran off >the train. > Shortly after, Amy had made it to the downtown apartments where she lived. > Chapter Six > Tails looked up from his comic book. "Sonic, what’s wrong?" He asked as Sonic >walked through the door. Shorty: Fermat's Theorem! That's what's wrong! > "I’m just upset with how I treated Amy earlier today. Must be the stress. -.-;" > "Why don’t you take her somewhere?" > Sonic arched an eyebrow. "You mean a date." Matt: No, I meant to kill her. > "You know it’s what she’s always dreamed of." > "I’ll think about it. I’m goin’ to bed." > "Goodnight, big bro. I am going to stay up and watch some T.V. and finish >reading this." Tails held up the comic book. Lil: It was, coincedentally, the Super Special with Sailor Chibi Rose in it. TLoB: No way! > "G’night, little bro. See ya in the morning." Sonic walked into one of the two >bedrooms. He took off his light speed shoes and climbed in bed. "Amy, I promise I’ll >make up for today. I’ll come up with something..." The hedgehog hero fell asleep. > Amy was also in bed, Matt: HEN... *Shorty hits him over the head with a frying pan* > looking at all the Sonic posters around her room. "I wanna’ tell Sonikku what I’m feeling, *Shorty waits* . . . Shorty: He's gonna say it. He's gonna say HENTAI. TLoB: Not while he's unconscious he's not. Lil: Good point. >but I don’t know where to start. Oh, why should something this easy be so hard to do. I >just wanna’ say to him that I love him." Amy yawned, closed her eyes, and slowly drifted >off to sleep. > "Hmph, I hate that Sonic." Dr. Eggman said. He was sitting on something that >could keep him afloat. "Always ruining my plans. He’s not going to get away with this." TLoB: Arrgh! It's The Quotes Syndrome Again! Lil: He's back on the capitals! Cool! Shorty: *wields frying pan again* > Then, suddenly, several metallic hands shot up from the water and tried to grab Eggman. >Frantically, the evil scientist swam toward land. He layed sprawled out on the ground. > "What the hell was that?" Eggman thought. "Something is alive out there. And I >don’t want find out what it is." He got up and walked off to a hidden part of the city. Shorty: Wake Matt up. We need to do an "All" comment. *Lil wakes Matt up* Matt: Uhmn? TLoB: We're doing an "All" comment. Shorty: Read the last paragraph. You'll know what to say. Matt: *Reads* O... kay... Shorty: Alright, ready? 1,2,3... All: Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight. > Here ends the story, but the adventure is just beginning. > The End...For Now Lil: Can we go NOW? Shorty: Umm... yes. *Shorty, Lil, and TLoB depart* The story "Amy Adventure" is (c) it's author, Ashley, Shorty is (c) Neil Lafrenais, Matt the Yak is (c) Matt Newman, TLoB and Lil Hedgehog are (c) ... uhmn.. whatever their real names happen to be. Sonic and all related characters are (c) SEGA Enterprises, Ltd. Any resemblance to people, places, etc. etc. is merely coincedental; this MiST (c) Matt Newman, July 2000. Matt bears no form of malice towards the author of the fic, it's a mere satire. This MiST is (probably) dolphin safe, and contains surprisingly few CFC's. No animals were hurt in the making of this MiST (they never felt a thing.) Pointless rambling ending... now. Matt: Uhmn... guys? Can you tell me the way out of here? Please? Guys?